To Be Young Again
by Ladytiger47
Summary: Jiraiya find a ring to make him young and he ropes a ramen loving knucklehead along but what happens when the perv tries and swindle Naruto out of his promise. Naruhina in the end, pranking, laughs, torture, and good old Naruto humor, OOC.
1. Will he ever learn?

To Be Young Again-Chapter One

_Jiraiya takes a 'trip'_

"Ow, why did Tsunade have to hit so hard?" Jiraiya muttered as he continued his walk back to Konoha...at least he think he was.

'_Kuso, where the heck did I land?'_ he asked himself trying to find some kind of marking or scenery he was familiar with. All he could see was trees, trees, and more trees.

"She must have been madder than I thought" he thought out loud, thinking back to how he got into this predicament.

_*flashback*_

"_For the millionth time Jiraiya, NO" Tsunade yelled, furiously trying to finish all the paperwork that had piled up. _

"_Come on Tsunade" Jiraiya asked with a pout-like voice. "I'll buy you a bottle of sake and then we can drink the sake from cups, the bottle, off your body..." Jiraiya said with a perverted grin on his face. Too bad for him he was too busy thinking about that last image that he missed Tsunade hand, glowed with chakra, and earned a well-placed uppercut to his chin sending him through the roof of her office and farther than he usually went._

Sighing, Jiraiya rubbed his chin and winced at how tender the skin was.

"Ugh. It hurts like crazy."

After walking for several more minutes, the sound of running water nearby caught his attention.

'_Good, I was starting to get thirsty' _he thought as he quickly made his way towards the sound of the running water. After a few minutes, he came across a river running further deep into the forest_. 'Ah, good cold, refreshing, water'_ as he cupped his hands into the cold water and brings it to his lips. After drinking his fill, he searched around for some food. _'There has to be some fruit around here somewhere.'_ Looking around, he noticed there wasn't one speck of food anywhere.

"Great, there is no food, no way to carry water, and worse of all...no girls to spy on."

Stomach growling, he sat back down, back facing the river, head hung in defeat.

"KA-PLUNK."

Hearing splashing, Jiraiya turned his head in time to see a fish jump out of water and land back in, spraying Jiraiya with water droplets.

"Hmm, you will make a tasty meal" as he quickly made his way over to river.

'_Come on out again, you little morsel'_ Jiraiya thought, grinning as he waited for the fish to surface again. He then saw bubbles appear on the surface of the water.

"Gotcha," he said softly hands out ready to catch the fish. However, he wasn't expecting a fish about the same size as him to jump out. "Waah" Jiraiya screamed as the monster fish jumped out, drenching him in the cold water. Sputtering he tried to back away but the water around the banks of the river was slippery and he fell in. "KUSO *splash*" is all that Jiraiya had time to say before he was swept away by the powerful current. He continued to be swept deeper into the forest as he fought for every breath when he surfaced.

'_Why is this current so strong?'_ as Jiraiya tried to fight against the fast-flowing river. As he started winning, he was pushed further down into the water as the river he was currently in joined with another making the river move faster and stronger than it had before.

As he continued to be pushed around, he tried to get back to the surface but the harder he tried, the stronger the current fought back. As Jiraiya felt as he was about to drown, he surfaced again to breathe in giant gulps of air before he was pulled back down again.

'_It's like the water is playing with me'' _Jiraiya thought as he continued to fight. Sighing mentally, he stopped fighting the current and let it carried him wherever it was flowing. That _'wherever'_ happened to be a cavern where the river became a nice little waterfall ride that pushed him down into a pool of water that is waiting for him at the bottom.

"SPLASH" is the only sound heard as Jiraiya made he tumbled down into the pool of water. After a few seconds, he resurfaced, spluttering and cursing his luck, as he washed up on the shores of the small lake.

'_Why is my luck so bad today?' _as he dragged his wet and freezing self-up farther on land.

"Achoo!" he sneezed as he began to shiver from the chilling air and the icy water ride. Looking around, he noticed some washed-up tree limbs and branches that took the same route as him. "These should make a nice fire" as he checked to see if the wood could be of use. Placing the firewood in a pile, he made some hand seals and used his _Fire Style: Flame Bullet _to ignite the pile of wood. After he warmed up and dried his clothes, Jiraiya began to take in his surroundings and see if he could find an exit. Noticing a cave not far from where he was sitting, he decided to go explore it.

"Maybe I can find an exit" he muttered as he got up and walked over to the cave entrance. Next to the cave, was some symbols carved into the wall. DANGER". "I wonder what the symbols mean" Jiraiya asked himself as he studied the symbols closely.

"Oh well, got no other way to go as he headed deep in to the cave."

Unknown to him, the symbols was a warning and in fact spelled "DANGER" which meant that Jiraiya needed to stay on his toes as he headed deeper into the unfamiliar territory.

"Man I wish I had some light" he grumbled as he walked deeper into the cave.

'_I could use one of my fire jutsus, but with my luck...' _

Jiraiya just kept moving forward, hands against the walls, feeling his way since the cave was getting darker with every passing step.

"I hate this cave, that river, and the darkness…OMPH."

Jiraiya fell on the ground after tripping over something in his way. Muttering curses, he picked himself up and examined what made him trip.

"Hmm, it seems my luck is turning towards the better" he stated, holding a thick branch in his hand and lighting the end of it like a torch. Now being able to see where he was going, he casually walked ahead grinning at his good fortune...until he stepped on a trap.

Feeling the ground underneath give way, he quickly jumped right before falling to his doom in a spiked pit. Growling, he picked up the torch he dropped while narrowly avoiding poison kunai that just came out of the wall. Realizing the cave was booby-trapped, he did the best and most logical thing he could do in his current situation-mutter curses as he ran through the cave, avoiding traps as best as he could.

'_Why...is...this...happening...to...ME!' _Jiraiya screamed in his head as he dodged poison kunai, jumped over pitfalls, and ducked under fireballs randomly flying from every direction. Seeing the end, he used an extra burst of chakra in his legs and jumped, narrowly avoiding giant shurikens and landing into...another cavern with a dead-end.

"GAAH, WHERE'S THE EXIT IN THIS PLACE!" Jiraiya yelled and punched the wall in frustration. Just then, the wall gave way and he landed face-first into a secret room.

'_I bet Tsunade has a mini voodoo doll of me and is just torturing it to insanity'_ Jiraiya grumbled face still in the dirt.

"Man, my life was easier when I was younger. Look at Tsunade, same age as me and getting more beautiful...and bustier" Jiraiya grinned, thinking about Tsunade gifted breasts. Sighing, Jiraiya got up and dusted himself off.

"Ugh what I wouldn't do to be half my age again."

Looking around he noticed that the cavern was brighter than the one he just left.

'_There might be an exit nearby' _as he started looking around for the source of light. However, what drawn his attention was a statue in the middle of the room.

"It's...beautiful" Jiraiya said wiping a tear from his eye. He wasn't talking about the beauty of the statue for it was made of polished stone, but the _picture_ the statue was displaying. The picture was of a man with four beautiful women crowding on his right side. "Now _that's_ how I want to live" Jiraiya said shaking his head in approval.

'_I wonder how I can live like that—hello, what is this?' _

Jiraiya then studied the statue more closely.

_'Why is his right side the face of a young man, but his left side is the face of an elder one?' _

Jiraiya then noticed the ring on the statue's right hand.

"Did he marry the girls?" Jiraiya grumbled, shuddering at the thought of marriage until he notice an indention on the statue's left hand and crumbles of stone behind his left side. "I wonder..." Jiraiya began twisting the ring off the statue's right hand. After a few more twist, the ring came off. As soon as the ring comes off, there was a rumble from the statue as the girls start to crack, break, and fall to the ground similar to the pile on the left side. "What's going on now?" Jiraiya then noticed the statue's features as it changed from the happy young man to a frowning, elder man who then begins to crumble and break until he too fell into a pile of rubble between the remains of the stone girls. "Even in death, you will lie with your girls" Jiraiya said bowing in respect and grinning like the pervert he was. However the grin was soon wiped away as the cave begin to crumble, blocking the way he came in. "Great, can this get any worse?" Just then, the walls on both sides begin to move closer in as if to turn him into a toad sage pancake. "I had to ask." Jiraiya mutters as he places the ring on his finger.

_'Kuso, how am I going to get out of here?' _as he looks for an exit. He then notices several holes in the wall behind the once standing statue that was letting in sunlight. Noticing how close the incoming walls were, he knew he had one shot.

"It's now or become a pancake" as he starts creating two Rasengan, one in each hand. Running towards the wall, he drives both swirling balls of chakra into what he believes to be the weak point. "_Rasengan_" Jiraiya calls out as the wall gave way to the outside world, taking him with it just as the two moving walls slammed together with a loud THUD. Breathing heavily, Jiraiya sighs, "that was too close" as he gets up on his feet again. Dusting himself off once again, he climbs up a tree to check his surroundings. Using his spyglass, that by some chance stayed with him all the way, he spots a road a quarter of a mile from where he was perched. "Better get going" he said starting to climb down, reaching down for the previous branch with his foot. As he put his weight on it the branch broke and he lost his balance. However something in Jiraiya's mind snapped and he then landed on the next branch and propelled his body 5 trees ahead from the one he was just on. Looking back, he stares at the ring that seems to glow with a mysterious power.

'_I could get use to this'_ as Jiraiya made his way to the well-used path through the woods. After leaping onto the path, he starts walking straight till he comes across a sign: "Crater City: 5 miles ahead".

"5 miles huh" Jiraiya says his stomach reminding him that he still hasn't eaten since the river incident. "And I got no money… great."

Sighing he walks slowly forward all the while paying attention to the thieves who were trying to rob him. Finally appearing in front, the thieves, with bags full of stolen merchandise, smirk as they try to intimidate him.

"Hand over all you valuables...and we might go easy on you" the thieves smirk thinking they were robbing another guy down on his luck. Well they were half right because they were trying to rob a guy down on his luck. Unfortunate for them, the guy they were trying to rob was one on the 3 legendary sages and was not in a good mood. Jiraiya, who was hungry, sent down a fast-moving river only to end in a cave and be nearly killed several times, was slightly irritated and itching to go to town. So what he did to the thieves is understandable as he quickly blew flame bullets at them, use a Rasengan that blew all but the leader away. Then he summoned a giant toad which then grabbed the leader and using its tongue swung him around and around until he let him go in the same direction as his fellow thieves.

"That will show you to mess with me" Jiraiya muttered as he watched the leader fly out of sight. "Oh what's this?" he said, picking up a wallet full of money. Grinning, he picked up all the valuables the thieves drop and decided to return them a few of them will be short of money though. Laughing Jiraiya hops onto the toad he summoned and rides on its back all the way to Crater City.

*Crater City*

'_Ah, now this is more like it. Food, sake, and women'_

Jiraiya laughed as the girls around him feed him karaage-fried chicken, give him sake from cups, and giggle at his jokes.

"Are you really an author?" one girl asks giving him a kiss on the cheek. Laughing again, he said he was indeed an author.

"You're so young though," another girl said feeding him some more chicken. Jiraiya just kept laughing as the girls kept praising him.

"You all are too modest" he says as he continues to let them feed, drink, and kiss him all night. He finally staggers back into room, drunk, and quickly fell asleep. Waking up with a hangover, Jiraiya makes his way to the store. Buying food and supplies he took his belongings and what he got from the thieves and placed them in his room. Leaving soon, Jiraiya decides to go to the hot springs in the town. Taking a dip in the water, he looks down at the ring that was still on his finger.

'_Maybe this ring is for good luck. I wonder why it was hidden and what did that statue mean?' _

Sighing, Jiraiya enjoyed his time in the hot spring before going back to his room. While leaving the hotel, Jiraiya was confronted by a mob of angry people as bystanders watched. Noticing some of the thieves from yesterday he figured out what the mob wanted.

"Can I help you gentleman with something?" Jiraiya asks not at all intimidated by the large group.

"We want our stuff back," one of the man yelled from the crowd as the rest muttered in agreement.

"What stuff?" Jiraiya ask acting as if he didn't know what stuff they were talking about. The leader of the group, a big man who was taller than Jiraiya, walked forward and glared at the toad sage.

"The stuff you have on your back in those bags. The stuff that was stolen from us and is rightfully ours."

There was more agreement from the crowd as the leader began to poke Jiraiya in the chest. When the leader stepped back, Jiraiya pulled the bags off his shoulder and placed them in front of him.

"Oh, this is all of your stuff?" the toad sage asked the mob as he looked at each face. "Well…here you go then" Jiraiya says and begin to walk away when he suddenly jumps out of the path of a flung kunai.

"You're not getting off that easily" the leader said who brought his arm back ready to knock Jiraiya's head clean off. Relying on reflexes, he ducked the blow, created a Rasengan in half the time it normally took, and placed it into the belly of the leader of the mob. The leader then went spiraling back, knocking over most of the people like a bowling ball knocking down pins.

"Next time you will think twice before attacking me-"

Jiraiya did his signature pose

"Jiraiya, the toad sage and one of the legendary sennin of Konoha."

The mob gasped as the watch their leader lose to one of the legendary sennin. Grabbing their valuables and their leader, the mob and the thieves turn tailed and ran away. Sighing, Jiraiya went on ignoring the crowds whispering as he made his way to the next city before going home to Konoha.

"Man this ring is awesome. I haven't felt this good in years" Jiraiya said actually starting to run from pent-up energy. But then he stopped and looked down at the ring. The ring was made up of a silver band with a blood-red stone that swirled with green and had the kanji for 'young warrior' written on the inside of the band.

"Hm, I better get the ring checked out first before something bad happens to me."

He quickly made his way to the next destination before returning to Konoha—Otafuku City.

"I remember this is the first stop me and Naruto made to find Tsunade. Felt like a lifetime ago" Jiraiya said to himself, nodding to the town's women who blushed and giggled around him_. _

'_Hm, must be something in the air or these girls realized a good quality man when they see one'_ Jiraiya thought (wishes) as he believed the words in his mind. With the money who took yesterday, he bought a hotel room and decided to catch up on his research around the town. Walking around he met many girls who was flirting with him.

"Hey there, want to come inside for a drink?" three girls, all dressed in half kimonos, asked.

"You bet!" Jiraiya answered going inside the sake bar where he spent the rest of day and night. The next three days Jiraiya stayed in Otafuku city drinking, womanizing, and just plain old having fun. However, his fun was about to end when the one person who knew his habits all too well entered the city, on an errand run for Tsunade.

"Eh, ero-sennin, what are you doing in this city?" Uzumaki Naruto yelled loudly after finding the perverted sage toad surrounded by a large group of females. Growling, the toad sage said, "I told you to stop calling me that" as he glared at the yellow-haired ball of energy. Sighing and knowing his time in the city was over Jiraiya got up and followed Naruto back to his hotel room.

"What are you doing here Naruto?" Jiraiya asked with a giant scowl on his face. However, he noticed Naruto staring at him funny. "What?" he asked wondering if he had something on his face.

"Why do you look…different?" Naruto asked staring awfully hard at pervy sage's face.

"What do you mean different? You were able to recognize me just fine earlier" Jiraiya snapped still angry at being interrupted with the girls.

"I mean you sort of remind me of Tsunade-baachan. I just can't quite figure out how" he said still looking at the sage.

"Did you get whatever you came to this city for?" Jiraiya asked picking up the bag he bought to hold his things.

"Huh, oh yea, I did" Naruto said following Jiraiya out of the hotel and on the road back to Konoha. "Hey ero-sennin," Naruto called walking alongside his former teacher.

"I told you to stop calling me that" he grumbled as he started to walk faster.

"Whatever. Where did you get the ring?" Naruto asked catching up with the toad sage easily.

"Eh, I found it" Jiraiya said and left it at that.

"Hm, that's funny because I read about a ring similar to the one on your hand" Naruto said hands behind his head thinking of what kind of ramen he was going to eat when he returned. Thinking about the savory noodles, he missed when Jiraiya suddenly stopped, after hearing that and stared at Naruto who continued to walk.

"Where?" Jiraiya asked eyes suddenly huge as he stared the retreating back of ramen-loving knucklehead.

"Huh, where what?" Naruto asked now noticing that Jiraiya had stopped moving. Naruto was surprised when Jiraiya was suddenly in front of him, shaking him asking 'where' over again.

"Where did you read about this ring Naruto? Hurry up and tell me where? WHERE?" Jiraiya kept asking still shaking the orange-clad ninja in front of him.

"Stop…shaking…me" Naruto asked feeling dizzy and sick to his stomach. Finally realizing what he was doing, Jiraiya let go of Naruto's jacket and stepped back for he thought Naruto was looking a little sick.

"Where did you read about this ring?" Jiraiya asked once again when the color returned to Naruto's face.

"I read about it in a book from the library" he responded, shaking his head to stop the dizziness.

"Since when did you actually read books, let alone go to the library?" Jiraiya asked.

"Hey, I do too read books and scrolls besides Sakura-chan asked me to return some books to the library for her" Naruto said angrily glaring at the perverted sennin. "While I was walking, the book fell open and I saw the picture of the ring. I picked it up and glanced at it, but I didn't read it" Naruto continued to walk next to the toad sage as they made their way back.

"Why didn't you read it?" Jiraiya asked wishing he knew more about the ring he wore on his right hand.

"I didn't want Sakura-chan mad at me and punching me like you was because I turned in her books in late to the library" Naruto said a smile on his face.

"Good point" Jirayia said, thinking about the pink-haired kunoichi who temper and strength could rival Tsunade's.

"…hey what you mean like I was?"

"I just stepped into the room right when Tsunade gave you an uppercut to the chin that sent you far away from Konoha" Naruto said grinning at the thought of seeing pervy sage rejected…again.

"Let's just get back to Konoha and find that book already" Jiraiya snarled as he walked faster back to the hidden leaf village.

"Hey, can we go get ramen first?" Naruto asked as he and the toad sage made their way home and unexpected surprises along the way.

_Catfight to Catwalk_

"Hey Naruto, you have anything to drink with you?" Jiraiya asked who was thirsty and sweating in the summer heat.

"No, pervy sage, I just got my empty canteen bottle" Naruto answered, shaking the empty container as if to prove his point.

"Must be something to drink around here" the thirsty toad sage muttered looking around as if a bottle of sake will magically appear on the road.

"There's a river not far from here" Naruto added looking at him out of the corner of his eye. Flinching slightly at the thought of going towards another river, he weighted in his mind how thirsty he was. Deciding the thirst out-weight the dangers of falling in again, he asked Naruto to take him there.

'_At least someone will be going under with me if I fall'_ Jiraiya thought walking along side Naruto who was deep in thought.

'_Hey Kyuubi, does Jiraiya seem…different to you?'_ Naruto asked in his mind as he faces the home of the demon fox living within him.

"**Like I actually pay that close attention to the pervert"** Kyuubi replied in a snotty way**. **_'_

_Well excuse me for asking you stupid fox'_ Naruto muttered as he left the Kyuubi's cage for the real world.

'_**But I do see what Kit means. If I didn't know any better I'd say that perverted sage was getting younger.'**_

As they cleared the forest, they came across a river that was, thankfully to Jiraiya, slower and much shallower than the one he tumbled down the other day. Quickly running ahead, he dipped his hands in the water and drank until thirst went away.

"Ah, that was refreshing" Jiraiya said as Naruto came and filled up his empty canteen. Looking at Jiraiya he blinked and stared hard as his face. Feeling uncomfortable under the intense stare, he asked why he was staring at him like that.

"…Are you using some kind of anti-wrinkle cream or something?" Naruto asked continuing to stare at Jiraiya's face.

"What kind of question is that?" Jiraiya yelled, glaring at his godson whom just questioned his looks.

"I mean-"

Naruto started walking closer to Jiraiya who started walking backwards trying to get away from the approaching blond.

"-that after you drank that water-"

Naruto was still walking towards him as Jiraiya started walking backwards, not noticing the rock behind his foot.

"-You suddenly became younger. You look like you're in your late twenties" Naruto said hand extended trying to touch Jiraiya's face to see if it was real.

"What you meeeaaann? *splash*"

Jiraiya tried to avoid Naruto's hand and his heel caught on the rock which sent him landing backside first in the water. Spluttering and coughing, he wiped the water out of his eyes as he looked down at his reflection.

"Whoa. How-wha?" is all that comes out of Jiraiya's mouth as he looks down at a 28 year old man that was staring back at him. Shocked, he just sat there in the water looking at his reflection. Then a giant perverted grin grew on his face as he started jumping up and down in joy. "Woohoo, my dream came true. This ring made me young again" Jiraiya screamed scaring some birds in the nearby trees.

"Eh, hey pervy sage, what happened to you?" Naruto asked in surprise at seeing his godfather act so…energetic.

"The ring Naruto, the ring" Jiraiya said thrusting his hand with the ring in front of Naruto's face.

"What about the ring?" Naruto asked as he and Jiraiya made their way back to the road to Konoha. Jiraiya then told Naruto his adventure down the river and into the cave…exaggerating a lot of the story.

"Then after summoning a giant toad we stopped the walls with our mighty awesome strength and broke through the back wall and to the next city" Jiraiya said nodding as if agreeing with himself. Naruto, however, wasn't the least bit convinced.

"Sure you did pervy sage. I bet after you entered the cave you ran through the whole thing trying to dodge kunai and pitfalls only to end up in a room with a statue and no exit. Then I bet you broke the statue when you took the ring and set off the walls where you desperately used a _rasengan_ to make an exit."

Naruto, who was walking in front, didn't notice when Jiraiya almost tripped due to surprise.

'_That brat nearly guessed everything I did. It seems he knows me better than I thought.'_

Straightening back up, Jiraiya quickly caught up to Naruto and they made their way back to Konoha. When Konoha was in sight, Naruto asked his godfather a question that made him stop fast in his tracks.

"So, what are you going to do when Tsunade finds out?"

Jiraiya stopped dead fast where he was standing.

'_Oh crap, I didn't think about that. Knowing Tsunade she will think that I will use the ring for research and…'_

Just then, Jiraiya got the biggest most perverted grin on his face after that thought.

"Eh pervy sage, why do you have that big perverted grin on your face for?" Naruto asked looking back when he noticed that he was walking alone.

"I just came up with the perfect idea on how to take advantage of the ring."

"We don't even know the side effects of wearing the ring or what it does" Naruto yelled concerned for his godfather's life and sanity…well what's left of it.

"Find we'll look it up at the library when we get to Konoha" Jiraiya said trying to calm the loud-mouthed brat before he told all of Konoha.

"But I want ramen" Naruto started to whine as his stomach started growling loudly. Sighing in defeat, Jiraiya agreed, to the joy of the hungry ramen-loving loudmouth knucklehead. As they approached the gate, Naruto warned Jiraiya to use a henge to look like his old self. Nodding in agreement, Jiraiya quickly did a henge and greeted the guards as they went pass them on their way to _Ichiraku Ramen._

"I'll meet you there pervy sage. I got to go deliver this package to Tsunade-baachan" Naruto cried out making his way towards the Hokage's office.

'_That boy is at stubborn as me sometimes' _Jiraiya thought as he made his way to his apartment to change and grab his stuff. After entering his temporary home, Jiraiya took a good look at himself in the mirror.

"Wow I do look a lot younger" the now young pervy sage said admiring his body in the mirror. Feeling that scratching feeling in the back of his throat again, he went to the kitchen, grabbed a cup, filled it with water, an finished it in one gulp. "Man, have I been thirsty lately," as he gulped down another cup of water. After his third cup, he grabbed his bag and set out for _Ichiraku Ramen_. By the time he got there, Naruto was already on his third bowl of ramen.

"You're late" Naruto said mouth full of ramen.

"I had to go home first and change" Jiraiya said sitting next to Naruto and ordering a bowl of ramen.

"Whatever you say pervy...sage?"

Naruto dropped his chopsticks in his ramen bowl as he stared wide-eyed at the person next to him. Jiraiya caught Naruto staring at him.

"What's the matter with you now brat?" he asked as the usually loud blond was silent, which actually scared him.

'_Kyuubi, are you using some kind of genjutsu on me or something?'_

"**I'm wondering if HE was using some kind of genjutsu and it's affecting me as well as you Kit" **Kyuubi answered, noticing how the perverted sage features changed dramatically since they last seen him.

"Are you going to keep staring at me or finish eating?" Jiraiya asked finishing his noodles and wanting to collect "valuable resource" at the girl's bathhouse. Snapping out of his trance, Naruto quickly ate the rest of his ramen, paid for his meal, and half dragged Jiraiya to the library. "Oy, slow down Naruto." Jiraiya said as he was forced all the way to the library and right through the doors.

"What was the name of that book?" Naruto muttered under his breath as he went down each aisle still dragging the poor sage who was trying to get loose. After finally getting free, he watched Naruto dart between each aisle muttering curses as he looked for a certain book.

'_Damn it, Kyuubi what was the name of that stupid book. Do you know?' _

"**The book was called **_**How to Feel Young: Magical Relics throughout History,**_ **though I'm not surprised you wouldn't remember Kit. **

'_Oh hush, Kyuubi…thanks.' _

After looking up the book, Naruto quickly went over to a table, searched the table of contents, and turned the pages until he found what he was looking for.

"It's here, pervy sage" Naruto said somewhat loudly earning him a few looks.

"I told you to stop calling me that and you're too loud in the library" Jiraiya said making his way over to the table Naruto was at. "What you find anyway?" he asked looking over the messy hair to see what made Naruto act like he did.

"The ring on your finger, it's called the _'ring of youth'_ and grants the wearer the ability to reverse their age over a period of time. That's why you been getting younger every time I see you" Naruto said looking at the ring on Jiraiya's finger.

"What else it says?" Jiraiya asked moving Naruto's messy hair out of the way.

"It says the longer the person wears the ring, the younger they look until they reach the desired age. The downside is the constant thirst the wearer will have, so whoever wears the ring should carry around plenty of drinks. The thirst will still continue even after the wearer reached the desired age. To reverse the effects of the ring, all the wearer has to do is take the ring off and keep it off for 24 hours."

"…that's it?" Jiraiya asked.

"It goes into the history of the ring, but that's not really important right now" Naruto said closing the book and putting it back on the shelf. Leaving the library, Jiraiya put on a henge and walked through the town with Naruto, thinking.

"So what are you going do while you're young? You know baa-chan is going to find out sooner or later."

Jiraiya was deep in thought thinking the same thing.

"What do you think Naruto? Naruto?"

Jiraiya turned to look at him and noticed something else that caught his ex-pupil's eye.

'_Wow, they're barely wearing anything'_ is what's going through Jiraiya's and Naruto's minds, as they notice some of the girls walking around in shorts and t-shirts thanks to the summer heat. That's when Jiraiya got the perfect idea on how to spend his youth.

*The next morning at _Ichiraku Ramen_*

"Come Naruto, I need your help" Jiraiya said quickly making his way to Naruto's apartment.

"My help with what?" the eager young blond said running to catch up with his now fast pacing god father. Turning around and giving Naruto the biggest grin he ever seen on the pervert's face, he said, "I need your help of getting sexy pictures of every kunoichi in Konoha" he said laughing his perverted laugh as he started planning on how to achieve his goal.

'_Kyuubi, I think Tsunade's punches and the heat has finally gotten to him.' _

And for once, the Kyuubi actually agreed with Naruto as they made their way back to Naruto's apartment and see what kind of plan the perverted toad sage was cooking up.

*Naruto's apartment*

"You want me to do WHAT?" the fox demon's host screamed as he looked at the perverted toad sage who never stopped showing how perverted he really was.

"You heard me right, Naruto. I want you to help me gather research on all the kunoichi in Konoha" Jiraiya repeated as the super pervert grin etched on his face. "Just think…all that research for my books. I'll even let you have the first copy of my new series, _To Be Young Again_" Jiraiya said already thinking of how he was going to write the series.

"Eh, I don't want your perverted books or help you collect your perverted data, either" Naruto said a frown on his face. "In fact, I'm going to tell baa-chan about that stupid ring right now" Naruto yelled heading towards the door.

"NO!" Jiraiya nearly screamed running ahead and blocking the exit in front of Naruto. Naruto then headed for the balcony. "Please Naruto, this is a once in a life time opportunity. I'll…I'll…I'll buy you a year's supply of ramen" Jiraiya said hoping that Naruto wouldn't snitch. Naruto paused just as he got one foot on the rail.

"… really pervy sage? If I help you with your data collecting, you will buy me a year's supply of ramen?" Naruto asked looking back at the mid-twenties year old man who had tears in his eyes.

"Yes. Yes I will, just please don't tell Tsunade yet" Jiraiya said actually getting on bended knees begging, Naruto not to go.

'_Wow, he's really serious. Hm, if it gets me a year supply of ramen…'_

"Okay, pervy sage" Naruto said, placing his foot back on the ground.

"Really? You will help?" Jiraiya said eyes bright with unshed tears. "Thank you, Naruto. Now this is what we need to do" Jiraiya said clear faced and grinning.

'_Was he even really crying?'_ Naruto thought suspiciously as he listened to his pervy godfather's plan on how to get the research.

"So you ready to help me, Naruto?" Jiraiya asked going towards the door.

"Yes, but wait" Naruto said making Jiraiya stop and turn around. "You might need some new clothes since your old ones will give you away. Although I'm curious on how they shrunk too" Naruto said following Jiraiya out the door and to the nearest store. After thirty minutes in the store, ten of those spent flirting with the clerk Jiraiya stepped out in a new outfit.

"It's perfect. No one will suspect me in this" Jiraiya said looking down at the outfit of his youth. He was wearing a black shirt with the design of flames on the sleeves and a Konoha leaf on the back. He also wore black pants that had red and orange flames at the bottom. He also carried a dark green backpack slung over his shoulder with a chibi green frog on it.

"Wow, you really look different, pervy sage" Naruto said coming out of the store with a new fox backpack.

"Hey, you going to have to stop calling me that or else YOU will give me away" Jiraiya hissed looking around for anybody familiar who could have heard the loud blonde.

"Okay, so what am I to call you then?" Naruto asked as he started walking through the town not really heading to any destination.

"Hmm, something that Tsunade won't guess as me" Jiraiya said looking down at the ring once more. They stopped at a store to buy Jiraiya a large canteen he filled with water for when his throat itched. As Jiraiya tilted the canteen to his lips, Naruto saw how the ring shined in the sunlight.

"How about Yuusu (youth)?" Naruto suggested looking at the ring.

"That's…brilliant Naruto" Jiraiya said giving his godson a smile. "Ok. So my fake name is Yuusu and I'm from…crap I haven't thought that far ahead. And knowing Tsunade she is going to want to see proof" Jiraiya said looking around as if voicing her name would send the Hokage right to them.

"Hmm, how about the demon country?" Naruto said secretly laughing as the toad sage looked around in fear.

"Huh, why did you choose the demon country?" Jiraiya asked looking at Naruto who was hiding a grin.

"Well, on my adventures, I meet and saved the Shrine Maiden of that country. She asked me if I _'wanted to help her pass the power on to the next priestess'_?" Naruto said thinking about that time on the mountain. He missed the look of absolute shock on Jiraiya's face when he said that_. _

'_I don't believe it? This boy can get Shrine Maiden to want him, but I can't get a date with an old teammate?'_ Jiraiya thought glumly, hanging his head in shame.

"What did you say Naruto?" Jiraiya asked knowing the blonde was dumb enough to refuse.

"Eh, I said sure and that I was up for anything" Naruto asked wondering why everybody had strange looks on their face after he said that. "Eh, you're okay per- er- Yuusu?" Naruto said quickly catching his mistake as he watched the young sage bent over, head hanging down in depression.

"Yes Naruto, everything is just fine" he replied sulking as they made their way to one of the training grounds.

'_**I don't know why, but seeing the perverted toad sage's expression after learning about the priestess wanting Naruto makes me wants to laugh' **_Kyuubi thought as he watched Naruto tell Jiraiya about all his adventures_. _

'_How does he get all the girls from distant lands to go crazy for him? What is he doing that I'm doing wrong?'_ Jiraiya thought as they made it to the training grounds. Once there, they heard arguing and name calling.

"In your dreams, Ino-pig. Sasuke-kun would never want a stick figure like you."

"Yea like your flat-chested self could catch his attention forehead."

"Wow, what's with the name-calling kunoichi, Naruto?" Jiraiya whispered looking at the two girls who were almost growling at each other. Naruto answered his question by loudly saying, "hey, Sakura-chan. Hey Ino." Both girls quit glaring at each other and turned to Naruto.

"Hey, Naruto," both girls responded than turned to look at Jiraiya. Their eyes suddenly went wide as they looked Jiraiya up and down.

"Hey Naruto, who's your friend?" Ino asked still looking Jiraiya up and down. Sakura had a slight frown on her face.

"Hey looks strangely familiar to me" Sakura said squinting at Jiraiya as if it would tell her who he was_. _

'_Crap, I didn't think about that pink-haired girl Tsunade trained. She will figure it out and tell…my resource'_ Jiraiya mentally cried as he waited for Sakura to guess who he was.

"His name is Yuusu and he is pervy sage's…nephew. He came from the demon country to visit his uncle in Konoha" Naruto quickly lied to save his free year's supply of ramen.

"**Smooth save, Kit. I guess hanging out with that masking-wearing perverted sensei of yours really paid off"** Kyuubi complimented Naruto on his cover-up story. Realization and a blush came over Sakura's face as she remembered the incident with Naruto and the priestess at the end of their trip.

"Nice to me you, Yuusu" Ino said giggling a bit.

"Nice to meet you too, Ino-san" Jiraiya said politely even bowing in her front of her.

"Oh my. So, what do you do for a living?" Sakura asked impressed at how well-mannered he was.

"Why I'm a novelist" Jiraiya said realizing his mistake too late.

"You're not as perverted as your uncle are you?" Sakura asked reaching for her gloves. Thinking quickly, Jiraiya came up with a story to hide his pervert-ness.

"No actually I interview female kunoichi and ask about their favorite summer-time clothes" saying the first thing that came to mind. Naruto and Kyuubi were both thinking the same thing.

'_They won't buy that story/__**They won't buy that story**__.'_

However, surprising all three, the girl's eyes suddenly sparkled and said how cool that was. Naruto and Jiraiya sweat dropped as they watch the two girls, who were just arguing a few minutes, now talking about being interviewed.

"So, what kind of interview are you conducting today?"

"What's the name of your works?"

"Do you have a copy of your magazine?"

The two friends/enemies were asking rapidly, getting closer and closer to Jiraiya.

'_Great, how am I going to get out of this one?' _Jiraiya was thinking as he was trying to come up with more lies. Thankfully, Naruto, fueled by the idea of free ramen, once again came to his rescue.

"Hey, Sakura-chan, Ino, what were you two arguing about before we arrived?" Naruto asked slightly enjoying how uncomfortable pervy sage was in the situation. Remembering Naruto, they suddenly looked at him and then at each other. Smiling, Sakura asked Naruto if she could ask him a question. Just then, Ino intervened by saying, "no way forehead he'll pick you only because he had a crush on you."

"Fine then, we will let Naruto AND Yuusu decide on who looks better" Sakura said and the two girls began to argue again. Trying to stop them from arguing, Naruto asked loudly, "what do you want us to do?" Surprised, both girls blinked and looked back at Naruto and Jiraiya.

"We want you to judge who looks better in a two-piece bikini" both girls said at the same time. Both Jiraiya and Naruto's mouth dropped. Even the Kyuubi was cleaning out his ears to make sure he heard right.

"Can you repeat that?" Naruto asked wondering if the summer heat was getting to him too.

"We want you two to be the judges of our swimsuit contest. Do you mind?" both girls asked all seriousness showing on their faces and in their voice. Both Jiraiya and Naruto glanced at each other. Grinning, they both said one word.

"Ok."

"Yay" the girls said as they grabbed their bags full of swimsuits and made their way to a nearby pond.

'_This is going to be the best day of my life'_ both boys thought as they followed the babbling kunoichi to their contest showdown.


	2. For All to See

To Be Young Again-Chapter Two

_For All to See_

"I can't believe that actually asked us to be judges" Naruto said sitting in the tree as the girls put on their first bikini to be judged.

"Me neither but this makes it easier to get my resource" Jiraiya said the perverted grin on his face.

"Get rid of that grin before the girls see it" Naruto said as he heard the girls call out that they were ready. Coming out of the bushes, the girls stepped close to the pond as Naruto and Jiraiya jumped down from the tree they were resting in.

"So how do we look?" both girls ask posing in front of their makeshift judges. Both boys only could stare and drool as they saw what the girls were wearing. Ino was wearing a purple two-piece bikini with a design of yellow flowers growing on vines. Sakura was wearing a green two-piece bikini that matched her eyes with a Japanese cherry blossoms design_. _

'_I'm so glad I agreed to this'_ is what is going through their heads as they watch the girls model and pose in their bathing suits.

"…Wow. You both look so amazing" Naruto said not able to take his eyes off the sight in front of him.

"I'll say. It's too hard to choose between two beautiful kunoichi" Jiraiya stated drawing the girls in their swimsuits.

"Both of you would make good models when you're older."

"Thank you" both girls said at the same time. Then they both got into another argument about who would become a better model when they grew older.

"Fine then, let's use a henge to transform into what we might look like when we're older and let them decide then" Sakura suggested thinking of what her future self would look like.

"Fine" Ino agreed quickly as both girls made a hand seal and changed into their older selves.

"How do we look now?" Sakura and Ino asked in a deeper, sexy voice as they started to strut around in their swim suits trying to outdo the others. Naruto and Jiraiya started wiping the sweat off their faces from the summer heat…and the heat of the girls.

'_Man these girls look hot in their bathing suits'_ they think as they continued to drool.

"Beautiful" boy of them replied unable to form any other words.

"Gaah, I can't choose between you too. You both look hot…literally" Naruto said as he noticed their skin started to darken as they stayed in the blazing sun.

"I think you too should cool off in the pond before you get sunburn" Jiraiya suggested really wanting to see them wet from the water. Agreeing with them, they quickly jumped into the pond to escape the heat of the day.

"Hey, you boys look like you're hot so you want to join us?" the girls called out splashing each other with the water.

"What do you say, Yuusu? Yuusu?" Naruto asked looked around for the toad sage but only found his clothes where he was just standing.

"Don't just stand there Naruto, come and join us" Jiraiya said already in the water with the girls. Turning around Naruto sweat drop at how fast his perverted godfather got in the water while Kyuubi was laughing saying that Jiraiya had used his perverted speed. Sighing, Naruto strip down to nothing but his boxers and joined the guys and Jiraiya.

"Ah, this does feel good" Naruto said slipping into the water. After staying in the water for a while, the girls and guys got out. Jiraiya believing he got enough data on Sakura and Ino decided to leave.

"Before you two go can you put some sunscreen on our backs?" the girls asked as they lay down on some towels they brought with them. Shrugging, the boys went and poured sunscreen on the two kunoichi.

'_This moment can't get any better'_ Jiraiya was thinking as he rubs the lotion onto Ino's back as Naruto did the same to Sakura. Just then, a large splash was heard followed by someone yelling.

"Eek, you almost got me wet, you stupid water idiot" Karin shrieked as Suigetsu popped his head out of the pond.

"You're wearing a bathing suit, aren't you going to get in the water?" Suigetsu said trying to splash Karin, who jumped out of the way.

"I'll get in the water later, first I want to sunbathe" Karin said heading towards where the other four ninjas was standing. Finally noticing them, she stopped and glared at them. "What are you doing here?" Karin yelled at them, looking at Sakura and Ino in their bathing suits.

"We have the right to be here" Sakura and Ino yelled glaring at the redhead.

'_Uh oh and another girl joins the fight' _Naruto and Jiraiya thought as they slowly backed away into the shade of the trees. Suigetsu just stayed in the water, watching the showdown that was about to take place.

"Heh. You think you're going to impress Sasuke-kun in those outfits" Karin sneered looking over the girls outfits.

"What did you say wench?" Ino yelled staring at the redhead.

"You heard me" Karin responded a smirk on her face.

"Hm. You're not going impress my Sasuke-kun wearing _that_?" Sakura said looking at Karin's swim suit. Karin was wearing a red swimsuit that matched her hair with pink perfume hearts design.

"Oh, this isn't what I'm wearing to impress Sasuke-kun." Karin said a smile as she opened her bag. "_This_ is what I'm wearing to impress Sasuke-kun" Karin said pulling out a skimpy bikini. The girls gasp and the boys started drooling again. Jiraiya whipped out his notepad and started to draw and take notes of Karin's new swimsuit. It was a two piece bikini that looked more like lingerie than a bikini. It was a darker shade of red and had a picture of a hawk with its wings outstretched on the top.

"You will look so slutty in that" Ino and Sakura said, secretly liking the swimsuit.

"Well at least I have _assets_ to fill out my bikini" Karin said as she started to walk away with her towel to find a good tanning spot. However, those words were the final straw for Sakura and Ino. With a double battle cry, Sakura and Ino jumped Karin and started to shred the bikini she was wearing. The three boys just stood and watched in awe as the three girls went down in a fight.

"This is more like it" Jiraiya silently said as he continued to take notes. Naruto didn't know whether to stop them or not.

'_Best not unless I want to get pummeled to death_' Naruto thought as he watch as the girls got closer to the water.

"Hey, you about to fall into the *SPLASH*…never mind" Naruto said too late as the three fighting kunoichi went flailing into the pond Suigetsu jumping out of their way.

'_**That should cool them off'**_Kyuubi thought sadly, who was enjoying the show of the three girls fighting. _**'…or maybe not'**_ Kyuubi thought happily as he looked through Naruto's mind as the three struggling and now wet girls continued to fight in the water. The water was falling off their now naked bodies because all three kunoichi's bikinis had been ripped off. The lack of clothing, the sexiness of the girl's fighting, and the sun shining on the water making the girl's glow was too much for the perverts. Jiraiya and Naruto both flew back into the nearby bushes with massive nosebleeds as the girls continued fighting only to be finally stopped by Kakashi who heard the commotion while walking back from the bookstore. The three kunoichi, wrapping their naked bodies in their beach towels, grabbed their bags, gave one last glare to each other, and quickly left for home. Suigetsu just sighed and returned to swimming in the pond.

"Finally some peace and quiet," he said as Kakashi went over to the bushes to check on the pair.

"It seems you too had quite a show" Kakashi said his one eye looking down at their nosebleeds.

"Hey Kakashi-sensei. I want you to meet Yuusu, Jiraiya's nephew" Naruto said as he and Jiraiya lifted themselves out of the bushes.

Kakashi had a look of surprise on his face when he looked at Jiraiya.

"Nephew? I thought he was Jiraiya's son from the way he looks exactly like him. Hm. I want you to use Kai to make sure you're not an imposter" Kakashi said putting the book away and raising his hand to his forehead protector. Naruto and Jiraiya looked at each other and shrugged.

"Okay" Jiraiya said releasing all his chakra to show that it fact wasn't a henge he was using. Kakashi eye opened wide as he noticed that Jiraiya didn't change.

"Who are you?" Kakashi said in a fighting stance. Suigetsu just watched the show from the water. Naruto looked at Jiraiya as he asked him a silent question.

'_Should we tell him?'_ Naruto was asking silently and Jiraiya just nodded in answered.

"Okay, Kakashi-sensei, can you keep a secret?" Naruto asked as he, Kakashi, and Jiraiya left the pond area and started heading for Ichiraku Ramen explaining everything on the way.

"So you're pretending to be Jiraiya's nephew to get resource on the kunoichi in Konoha for your new series?" Kakashi repeating as they continued walking.

"Yep and if you help by warning us about Tsunade's whereabouts, I'll give you a pre-release, one of a kind, limited edition of the new series signed by me as a reward" Jiraiya taunted knowing that Kakashi wouldn't say no to a new series of books. Kakashi stopped and looked at Naruto.

"What are you getting for helping Jiraiya with his 'resource'?" he asked knowing that Naruto wouldn't be swayed by Jiraiya's books.

"I'm getting a year's supply of ramen for helping him" Naruto said as Kakashi nodded guessing it had something to do with ramen since it was Naruto.

"So will you help us?" Jiraiya asked once again knowing Kakashi wouldn't say no.

"…alright I'll help" Kakashi said already thinking about the new series.

"Great, so just warn us whenever Tsunade is close by, ok?" Jiraiya said as they made it to Ichiraku Ramen.

"Does that include now?" Kakashi said as he pointed behind them. Turning quickly, they both spotted Tsunade in the distance who was coming towards them with Sakura, Ino, and Karin on her tail.

"…Got to go" Jiraiya and Naruto said quickly running in the opposite direction and away from the busty Hokage.

"I think you better hide in my apartment until the coast is clear" Naruto said handing the key to Jiraiya who took it quickly. Naruto turning quickly went to Tsunade who, thankfully was looking for Kakashi and not Naruto and Jiraiya. Sighing, Naruto went to Ichiraku Ramen and ate his fill of ramen and went home. With the sun going down, they decided to find their next victim-er- interviewee tomorrow as they re-watched the picture of the scene that they witnessed today over in their minds.

"Ready Naruto?" Jiraiya asked early the next morning already looking forward to more kunoichi-watching.

"Eh it's only 5 in the morning" Naruto said rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. "Besides I got to check to see if I have a mission today" Naruto said letting the early toad sage into the house.

"It's the summer you will just get a low-level mission anyway" Jiraiya said thinking about a different kind of mission-one involving more girls.

"I still got to go and check anyway…unless you want Tsunade baa-chan come looking for me" Naruto said through his door as he went to put on his black and orange jacket and pants. Shuddering at the thought of a pissed-off Tsunade, Jiraiya sighed in defeat, drinking water as he waited for the blonde to change and then followed Naruto to a nearby training ground. Jiraiya then watched as Naruto practiced his ninjutsu and taijutsu. Naruto then pulled out a weapons scroll and summoned a staff the same height as him.

"Since when did you use learn how to use a staff?" Jiraiya asked as he watched in amazement as Naruto started to train, moving it with fluid movements.

"After I saw how Asuma-sensei added wind chakra to his knuckle knives, I decided to try the same with a weapon. Swords work best but I'm not that coordinated with them, those are more of Sasuke's weapon of choice. So I decided to try and use a staff since it's unique like my wind chakra. It's easier for me to use and I can even send my chakra through it to make it a spear if I sharpen my chakra at one end and a bladed scythe if I make my chakra curve. It's difficult but I been practicing with Hinata-chan on how to get better control of my chakra."

Naruto then went back to practicing while Jiraiya watched wondering if Naruto have lived up to his father's legacy.

'_At the rate he is going, he might even surpass his father'_ Jiraiya thought but soon shook it away as Minato was a man who few could live up too, let alone surpass him. After an hour has passed, Jiraiya joined Naruto in a sparring match where Naruto was to push back all of Jiraiya's attacks. The two were so busy sparring; they didn't hear the sound of a body land on a nearby branch, waiting for the opportunity to strike. Suddenly a kunai came out of nowhere and would have struck Naruto if he didn't deflected it towards Jiraiya's oncoming Rasengan thus getting ridding of both threats.

"Whoa" Jiraiya said as the force of the wind from the staff blew him back into a nearby tree.

"Hm it seems you're getting better Naruto" Kakashi said looking down at his ex-pupil.

'_And looking more and more like the fourth everyday' _he thought as he pulled out a copy of Make out Tactics.

"If I were you Jiraiya, I wouldn't use the Rasengan since it gives you away" Kakashi said flipping to the page he left off on. "Besides you're about to have company soon…and it's not Tsunade" Kakashi chuckled as he noticed Jiraiya looking for a place to hide. Hearing footsteps in the distance, Jiraiya disappeared only to reappear next to Kakashi as Tenten make her way to the training ground. She was surprised to see Naruto already there, thinking the place was normally empty.

"Oh. Good morning Naruto. I didn't think anybody would be training this early in the morning" Tenten said eyeing Naruto's staff and making her way to join him at the training ground.

"Good morning Tenten. It's too hot any other time so I decided to train a little earlier than usual. It seems you had the same idea" Naruto said, eyeing Tenten's outfit made up of a tank top and shorts.

"Since you're here now, do you want to have a little spar? It seems you already warmed up" Tenten giggled noticing how soaking wet his shirt was which was showing off his well-developed abs.

"Sure, but shouldn't you warm up first?" Naruto asked getting into a fighting stance.

"I already warmed up this morning. Now since you're holding a staff, I believe you know how to use it. Let's see how good you are with it then" Tenten said summoning her own weapon and charged at Naruto posing to strike. Smirking, knowing that Tenten was testing him to see if he had any weaknesses decide to play along and pretend to hold the staff wrong. Snorting, Tenten went in to hit his left side when she was suddenly blocked and pushed back by Naruto. Surprised, she smiled as she realized the tester had become the tested.

"Impressive" Tenten said holding her weapon in her right hand, the same way as Naruto. "It seems my plan to test your ability has somewhat backfired, huh. But it doesn't matter because we fight for real this time" Tenten said charging faster than before at Naruto and giving her all in the sparring match. Jiraiya and Kakashi just watched as the two ninjas continued to spar for another hour. "Whew, you really do know how to use your staff well" Tenten said breathing hard as they finally called the sparring match off due to the heat. Putting her weapon away, Tenten then stretched her body and started rubbing a spot on her shoulder. "Ugh, my muscles still hasn't loosened since that mission" Tenten said trying to make her shoulder stop hurting.

"Here let me help you with that" Naruto said putting his weapon away and walking over to Tenten. He then started messaging her neck and shoulder until the tension that had built up went away.

"Wow, thanks. Where did you learn to give such good massages?" Tenten asked rolling her shoulder easier than before.

"After some hard training, I used shadow clones to give me a massage so I wouldn't be stiff and sore in the morning" Naruto said messaging the other shoulder.

'_With a little help from Kyuubi too'_ Naruto thought as he worked on a particular hard part on her shoulder.

"**Thank you Kit for acknowledging me at least."**

Tenten then gave out a moan of pleasure as Naruto massaged a tough spot and loosened up her muscles.

"Hey, before we have to go meet the Hokage later, do you think you can give me a quick massage?" she asked sitting down on a log her back to him. Looking up he saw Kakashi and Jiraiya well hidden and taken in the show. Shaking his head at his two former perverted sensei's, he sat down behind Tenten and gave her a full massage which she enjoyed, proof heard in the moans, groans, and sighs of pleasure and happiness. When Naruto was done, Tenten got up thanked him, planted a quick kiss on his cheek and quickly left for her house. Surprised, Naruto touched his cheek as he headed for home, unaware of the pair of eyes that watched him leave before disappearing too, along with the two perverts.

"What do you mean you got a mission? Jiraiya yelled looking at the eager young blonde packing his weapons scroll.

"I mean that baa-chan assigned me a B-rank mission and I'm not about to pass it up" Naruto said double checking his backpack to make sure he had everything he needed.

"But what about my research? What am I supposed to do now?" Jiraiya said eyes big with unshed tears, looking at Naruto.

"It's not going to work this time, pervy sage" Naruto said closing his pack and putting it on.

"I'll be back tomorrow morning. Since Kakashi-sensei is also going, I suggest you just lie low for a while to avoid being found out by Tsunade baa-chan."

"Fine. But you better try and hurry back" Jiraiya said as Naruto walked out the door.

"You bet, I'll do anything for my ramen" Naruto said as he quickly close the door.

"Yea I bet, except you are going to have to catch me first to get your free ramen" Jiraiya laughed, thinking how clever he was to trick Naruto into helping him.

"Kakashi, I'm still giving you the book collection though because you understand a true work of art."

Smirking, Jiraiya left Naruto's apartment and started to head home when he passed by the bathhouses and decided that the heat was torturing him.

'_A quick bath then I will stay home'_ he thought as he quickly made his way home to grab his bath things and back to the building. Jiraiya paid his admission fee and enjoyed the hot air wafting from the bath_. 'Ah, this feels good. It would be perfect if some girls came to join me'_ Jiraiya thought as he relaxed and let the hot water run over his naked body. As he heard splashing and laughter he opened one eye and saw something that nearly made him jump out of the water. Anko was in front of him, towel barely covering her breast as she continued to wash herself. Blinking, Jiraiya muttered, "I must have feel asleep and drowned in the bathhouse because I know good and well that there isn't a nearly naked female in front of me." Anko, hearing a male voice, turned around and noticed Jiraiya.

"Shit, I thought the male bathhouse was empty" she said as she looked at Jiraiya. Realizing he wasn't dreaming, he stared at Anko like she was a sexy siren ready to lure him into the rocks of death. Realizing he was staring at Anko, who was giving him an evil glare, he quickly looked around searching to see if he was in the wrong place.

"Uh…am I in the wrong bathhouse?" Jiraiya asked getting ready to run just in case he was. Anko blinked and started laughing as she shook her head no.

"No, you're in the right place. I'm the one who shouldn't be in here."

"Then why are you in here?" Jiraiya asked not fully realizing that a beautiful kunoichi was literally feet away from him covered in nothing but a towel.

"Ugh. The other bathhouse water is cold and was filled to the brim with old ladies" Anko stated making Jiraiya shudder at the thought of bathing with elderly women.

"So I thought since I didn't see anyone, I would sneak into the guy's bathhouse and take a quick bath before I was caught."

Sighing, Anko started to get up, but Jiraiya stopped her.

"You don't have to leave on my part, I won't hurt you" Jiraiya said not wanting this dream to end so quickly. Anko stopped moving, but didn't sit back down.

"What if someone comes, how am I going to explain my presence and I'm not about to henge to look like a guy because I have morals, if only a few" Anko said head held high as the towel started slipping. Thinking quickly, Jiraiya got up, looked around outside, put an _'out of order'_ sign on the men's bathhouse opening and snuck back in.

"There, I put an out of order sign so you can have all the privacy you need" Jiraiya said doing his one good deed for the year as he started to make his way towards the changing room.

'_What the heck is wrong with me? I'm leaving a hot kunoichi alone in the bathhouse alone, without me watching her'_ Jiraiya thought as he was about to open the door.

"Wait, you don't have to leave quite yet" Anko said towel slipping some more to show the top of her breast. Pausing, he looked back and nearly got a nosebleed at the sight of Anko's towel steadily lowering.

"I can't-, I mean-, uh, you need-" Jiraiya started mind distracted by Anko's towel dipping lower. Anko, noticing Jiraiya's line of sight, gave a small chuckle and dropped the towel. Jirayia got a mega nosebleed as he stared, drooling a little at Anko's generous assets. Giggling, Anko turned around and begin to wash herself again until she heard splashing coming from Jiraiya jumping back into the water. Smirking, she looked behind her and saw him, still with the nosebleed, drawing something on a notepad. Curious, she went to him and snatched the notepad out of his hand.

"Hey, wait a min-" Jiraiya stated but it was too late, Anko had seen what he was drawing. But instead of angry, she was surprised at the detail he showed in the drawing of her without the towel.

"Wow, you're a really good artist. I'm guessing you're new around here. Do you mind washing my back?" Anko said and asked as she turned around again, handing Jiraiya his notepad. Surprised, Jiraiya got a grin on his face as he started to wash Anko's back and answer her questions.

"My name is Yuusu and I'm actually a novelist who is interviewing kunoichi about what they like to wear during the summer" Jiraiya said as he finished washing Anko's back. "There you go" Jiraiya said the image of Anko forever etched in his memory.

'_Almost as good as Tsunade naked, almost' _Jiraiya thought as he moved back away from Anko.

"Well I need to be going the hot water is starting to get to me" Jiraiya said as he stepped out of the bath. Hearing splashing he turned around just as Anko stood up and walked butt-naked to the changing room.

"Ladies first" she said sticking her tongue out at Jiraiya just as she went into the room. "Also, when I'm at home during the summer, this IS what I like to wear" she said closing the door to change. With tears in his eyes and blood running down his nose, he thanked his luck for letting him find that ring that day. After a while, he checked the changing room, which was empty, changed, and headed his way home after grabbing some food to eat. He then arrived at Naruto's apartment where he cleaned up the pigpen as best as he could. He then drew everything he saw at the bathhouse in his notepad while drinking sake and thinking about a naked Tsunade. Rechecking his notepad he sighed a perverted grin as he fell asleep on top of Naruto's bed, dreaming about hot, naked and wet kunoichi.

_Project Fox Illusion_

Jiraiya felt something shake him as he was sleeping.

"Go away, can't you see I'm dreaming" the perverted sage said in his sleep, pushing whoever was shaking him. There was a slight growl and a mutter of words as Naruto, who just came home from his mission, made several shadow clones. Grouping together and counting to three, they all took a hold of Jiraiya and…pushed him off the bed. "Yah-ow" Jiraiya screamed as he was rudely awakened by being flung off the bed. "What was that for?" he yelled glaring at the smirking blonde as he got back up.

"You pushed me, so I decided to return the favor" Naruto said as he placed his bag on the bed. Sighing, Jiraiya got up off the floor and smothered out his wrinkled clothes.

"So how was your mission?" Jiraiya asked not really caring as he searched through Naruto's cabinets for food.

"It was pretty boring. We had to escort some priest back to his nearby village. Nothing even happen except him complaining, nonstop, about something being stolen from some sacred underground cave" Naruto said as he looked through his bag making sure everything was in there. Jiraiya spewed milk all over the place, not only because it was bad, but because the story sounded too close to where Jiraiya found the ring. "I guess I should have warned you the milk is bad" Naruto stated, restocking his first-aid kit for his next mission. "Did anything exciting happen to you yesterday?" Naruto asked a weird catch in his voice that went unnoticed by the sage who was rinsing his mouth out with water from the sink. Jiraiya then smiled as he retold Naruto everything that happened yesterday at the bathhouse. Surprised, Naruto mouth hung open slightly as he thought back to the Anko he remembered. "I think that ring also gives off an animal magnetism that makes females actually attracted to you" he said, laughing as he saw the frown on Jiraiya's face.

"Whatever gaki so are you going to help me with more research today?" he asked back to his perverted self. Sighing, Naruto just nodded as they headed out for breakfast at Ichiraku Ramen. "How can you eat so much of this stuff in one sitting?" Jiraiya asked noticing how fast Naruto's bowls were staking up. Naruto mumbled an "I don't know" with his mouth full of ramen.

"Hey pe-I mean Yuusu, when are you going to buy me my year's supply of ramen?" Naruto asked finishing the food in his mouth.

"When all my research for my books is done" Jiraiya said, taking a drink from his tea cup, not looking at Naruto as he finished his bowl of ramen. Quiet, Naruto paid for his meal as Teuchi came over.

"Hey Naruto, you okay?" he asked noticing the blonde's lack of excitement. Nodding without answering, he was about to get up and leave when he noticed something that made him look up at the old man.

"Eh, Yuusu you go ahead and find Kakashi-sensei. I want to talk to oyaji-san for a minute" Naruto said as Jiraiya shrugged and left to find his favorite book-fan. Jiraiya found Kakashi near the training ground that Team 7 had passed the bell test reading his book.

"Heh what are you doing here?" Jiraiya asked walking to the perverted sensei who was currently reading one of his works.

"Thinking...I want to ask you a question about Naruto?" Kakashi said putting the book down to look Jiraiya in the face.

"What's the matter with him?" Jiraiya asked actually sounding concerned since Kakashi put the book down to talk to him about Naruto.

"Naruto, has been acting a little distant, not to his team, but to me personally. I swear I seen him glare at me or more like the books when I'm reading and he gets this vacant look as if he withdrawn within himself. Do you think you can ask what's bothering him?" Kakashi asked, not wanting one of his former students mad at him and not knowing why.

"Sure I can. I might even buy him half the ramen I promised" Jiraiya said not feeling the least bit guilty about swindling Naruto to get the resource he wanted.

"You're going to try and cheat Naruto out of ramen?" Kakashi asked eye opening wide at the trick Jiraiya was talking about playing.

"He blackmailed me into demanding the ramen in the first place, so I see it as payback" Jiraiya said thinking at how the blonde said he was going to Tsunade's to report him. Kakashi, shaking his head, went back to reading his book and said 'I hope it doesn't come to bite you in the ass.' "Come on, I will be long gone before Naruto realize I'm missing" Jiraiya said laughing at how he was going to outsmart Naruto.

"Well, you better hope he doesn't find out about your plan because here he comes."

They both watched as the now excited blonde ran up to them with a smirk on his face.

"What are you so happy about Naruto and what did you need to talk to Teuchi-san for?" Jiraiya asked remembering that Naruto seemed gloomy at the ramen shop.

"Oh nothing important" Naruto said waving the question away. Before they could ask any more questions, Naruto was running ahead as if searching for something.

"Naruto, slow down" the two perverts said running after the yellow ball of energy, unaware that they were being watched by pale white eyes.

"Hm, so that's the sennin known as Jiraiya" Neji said watching as the perverts ran after Naruto_. _

'_Should I tell Tsunade now?'_ Neji thought but remembered the look on Naruto's face. _'Or maybe I should wait and see what Naruto has planned for him.'_

Naruto then ran to a nearby stream that he remembered during his test with Kakashi after he came back and saw the person he wanted to see.

'_Perfect'_ Naruto thought as he spied Hinata dipping her feet in the cool slow-moving stream, her jacket hanging on a tree branch nearby.

"Hey, Hinata-chan" Naruto called out surprising the dark-haired kunoichi who started slipping as she turned around and got up off the rock she was sitting on.

"N-N-Naruto-kun!" Hinata called out as she was about to hit the water when she felt strong hands grab her and turn her around as Naruto hit the cold water with Hinata on top of him.

"Hinata-chan, you're okay?" a cold and wet Naruto said looking up at her pale lavender eyes.

"Ye-yes Naruto-kun" Hinata said her face red from blushing.

'_Wow…Naruto looks really good wet and with his hair all over the place'_ she thought as she picked up the forehead protector that had fallen into the water. Lifting her up so she wouldn't get wet, he carried Hinata in his arms and set her back on the rock while he took off his jacket and shirt. He hung it on a nearby rock in the sun to dry while he talked to Hinata who handed him back his protector.

"Hey Hinata-chan, can I ask you something?" Naruto asked looking at her while she played with her fingers and blushed, still not used to Naruto using the 'chan' honorific at the end of her name. She and Naruto have been dating for about a year after they saved Sasuke from Madara's clutches. Naruto then begin to whisper something in her ear while the two perverts hid in the trees looking down at them.

"Grr, I can't read what he is saying her hair is in the way" Jiraiya whispered putting his spyglass away. "What about you, Kakashi? Can you see anything?" he asked looking at the masked ninja.

"No, I can't see his lips from here" Kakashi said recovering his eye.

"Well at least I got some good resource" he said looking down at the picture of Naruto carrying Hinata without her jacket on.

"You better hope Naruto doesn't see that picture of his girlfriend or you will be in a world of hurt" Kakashi said as he fished in his side pocket for his red book.

"I know that" Jiraiya said putting the notepad away and taking out the canteen. As they turned back to Naruto and Hinata, they noticed Neji appear from behind a tree and walking straight towards the lovebirds. "Uh oh, I sense trouble" Jiraiya said making sure he was well hidden before watching the show that was about to take place. However, the show didn't start because as soon as Neji was about to say something, Naruto handed Neji a scroll. Confused, he opened it, looked at it, eyes widening a bit, and just nodded with a grin on his face. Seeing him smile, he shook his head and watch Neji and Hinata leave Naruto, who was putting his shirt and jacket back on.

"…ittai?" (…the hell?) Jiraiya said out loud as he looked down at the blonde who started to walk towards them. Jumping down, Jiraiya and Kakashi landed right in front of him, asking what just happened. "Naruto, what was that all about? You are supposed to be helping me with my research. What were you whispering to Hinata and what was on the scroll you handed to Neji?" Jiraiya demanded angry that Naruto was keeping secrets from him. Kakashi didn't ask any questions, but he too was curious on what Naruto was hiding.

"Jeez, pervy sage calm down, I asked Teuchi-san about my relationship with Hinata. I then asked Hinata where Neji was because I had to give him a note, which is when Neji came over" Naruto stated looking at the sage with a slight grin on his face.

"What was on that note? Did you give me away you little brat" Jiraiya said eyes narrowing on Naruto, wondering if he gave him away to Tsunade.

"Oh for the love of- it was a letter to Hiashi-sama to ask for Hinata's hand in marriage" Naruto said angrily walking away so he wouldn't give in to the urge to use the Kyuubi's chakra to kick Jiraiya's ass. All was silent where Naruto left his two former teachers except for the sound of a crow flying above. Its cries of 'caw' made it sound like it was laughing at Jiraiya who felt like a major ass after the way he just treated Naruto.

"Nice job Jiraiya now Naruto is angry at you and not me, thanks" Kakashi said in a somewhat sarcastic way feeling sorry for the toad sage.

"…I'm such a baka" Jiraiya muttered as he went after Naruto with Kakashi on his tail. Somewhere else, Neji opened the scroll to reveal a message and two hidden scrolls sealed inside the one Naruto gave him. Smiling, Neji summoned one of the scrolls and handed it to Hiashi who read it and after a while agreed while he quickly left to give the second scroll to whom it really was for.

"…That's interesting thank you Neji. I'm glad I know now. Please inform everybody while I set something up."

Neji bowed and left the room going to find Naruto to tell him he delivered his message. Grinning, the person then grabbed a pen and started writing a letter needing the assistance of two dark haired shinobi that needed to get somewhere fast.

"Naruto, please wait up!" Jiraiya called out, chasing after the angry fox vessel_. _

'_According to plan'_ Naruto smirked as he made a hand sign and said "Kage bushin no Jutsu" and hundreds of Naruto ran in every direction confusing Jiraiya and Kakashi.

'_Kuso, which Naruto is the real Naruto?'_ they thought as they watched them go in every direction.

"There" Jiraiya pointed out a Naruto that was moving faster than the rest. Fueling chakra to their legs, they quickly ran after the black and orange clad ninja unaware of what waited for them.

"You're not the only one who can act pervy sage" Naruto said coming out of the shadows of a nearby alley.

"Is everything a go Naruto?" Neji and Hinata asked jumping down from the trees they were in to watch the show.

"Yep, my clones already informed all the shinobi who are setting things up" Naruto said with a grin on his face.

"I can't believe you're going to do this to your godfather?" Hinata said mildly surprised at how much Naruto was doing to get even with Jiraiya.

"At first, I wasn't but when I overheard him say how he was going to con me out of my free ramen before I left for that mission, I thought it's time he learned why I'm called Konoha's number one prankster" Naruto said with a fox grin on his face**. **

"**You are truly evil, I'm proud of you. Looks like that perverted toad sage is about to learn why it's not a good idea to try and con you out of ramen"** Kyuubi said laughing at what Naruto had planned for the old pervert.

"Where did he go now?" Jiraiya growled after they chased "Naruto" all across the fire country almost to wind country.

"Maybe that Naruto was a fake. I mean he has been getting better at outsmarting us" Kakashi's summoning dog Pakkun said as they were making their way back to Konoha after stopping at a stream. Meanwhile, the Naruto clone was having a nice little conversation with Gaara, Kankuro, and Temari who were on their way to Konoha riding on one of Deidara's clay birds with Sasori.

"…so that's the plan. Are you three in?" the clone asked mostly looking at Temari who had the biggest role.

"…Sure" Gaara responded looking at his siblings who were nodding in agreement.

"Great" the clone said about to disperse itself when he looked at Deidara then Sasori and smiled.

"…why are you staring at us like that, un?" Deidara asked an uneasy feeling washing over him. As the two perverts were walking back to Konoha, a giant shadow washed over them from above. Looking up, they saw one of Deidara's clay birds land in front of them about twenty feet away.

\

"Need a ride back to Konoha?" Temari asked as she and a mysterious stranger looked down at them from the bird.

"That would be grateful, thanks" Jiraiya said, tired from chasing the Naruto clone.

"Hop on" Temari said as she made room for the both of them and they jumped aboard. "Why are you two so far from Konoha?" Temari asked, pretending not to know already. The stranger, wearing a long cloak didn't say anything as the bird took off and slowly made its way to the hidden leaf village. As Temari's bird was taking off, Gaara and the rest were reaching Konoha.

"You're sure Temari will be okay?" Kankuro asked as Naruto and the rest jumped off the bird. The bird grew small again and Deidara placed it in his clay bag for safe keeping.

"Yes, I'm sure she will be fine. Jiraiya wouldn't dare try anything with her or Kakashi around. And if he does…well I know that Temari's fan and summoning weasel will make him think twice. Now the question is who would make the perfect person to play the next part?" Naruto wondered out loud as he thought of all the people he knew. Just than a piece of paper flew past his face, followed by another and another until the next then he knew he was being hugged by thousands of pieces of paper.

"Hello Naruto, long time no see" Konan said happily as she pieced herself together to greet her young friend who did so much for her, Nagato, and Yahiko. "Where's Jiraiya-sensei?" Konan asks looking around at the Leaf 13 Kisame (he's visiting), Itachi, the Sand brothers, Deidara, and Tsunade who had giant smirks on their faces.

"Oh, he will be here soon but first…Konan would you like to help us with a little…project?" Naruto asked a fox-like grin on his face.

"Huh, what kind of project?" she asked noticing the looks on their face.

"It's called Project Fox Illusion" Naruto said as Kyuubi laughed at the irony of it all.

"**That's the perfect name for this prank, Kit. This one will go down in history as the best and most elaborated prank you ever pulled. All hail the prank king, Uzumaki Naruto."**

"Wow. I can't believe that you're the toad sage's nephew" Temari said feinting innocence as she listened to their tale of chasing after Naruto after saying something hurtful.

"Yes, a lot people say that" Jiraiya answered using one of Temari's small fans to cool himself off. "I don't see how you can wear that dark color in this heat?" Jiraiya asked watching as Temari didn't break a sweat in the summer heat.

"I don't really feel the weather so it doesn't bother me" she replied turning around to face Konoha. Frowning at the fact that Temari didn't feel the heat he noticed the cloak figure in front of him.

"Who is your friend?" Jiraiya asked but Kakashi answered before she could reply.

"That's Akasuna no Sasori, Granny Chiyo's grandson" he whispered as they neared Konoha. Eyes widening, he looked at the hunched over man that was actually Hiruko, Sasori's puppet_. _

'_Ugliness must run in the family'_ Jiraiya thought shivering as he imagined what Sasori's parents had looked like. As if reading his thoughts, Temari spoke up and said that Sasori doesn't actually look like that and that he was hiding inside the puppet he was viewing.

"Oh ok" Jiraiya said, slightly embarrassed at being found out what was on his mind. "So, why doesn't he come out?" Jiraiya asked, the silence getting to him.

"Because I don't want to" he responded and left it at that. Sweat dropping, Jiraiya moved closer to Kakashi who was reading and enjoyed the rest of the trip to Konoha.

"I can't believe he would do something like that?" Konan responded angrily as she glared off in the distance, seeing the speck that was Deidara's bird coming back.

"Yea he did, so now I think it's time we give him what he wants so are you in?" Naruto asked grinning at his plan was coming along nicely. Smiling, Konan nodded and said that she was in, giggling at the thought of her former sensei's face when he saw what she was about to do. "Okay let Sasori know that we can precede Deidara while everybody gets into place" Naruto ordered as everybody nodded and went to get into position. "You're ready Konan, Hinata-chan?" Naruto asked as he changed into a female mixture of him and the Kyuubi.

"**Kit, I suggest you add fox ears and tails when you change that way he will believe that we "merged" together." **

Agreeing with Kyuubi, he changed the form into a redhead with yellow highlights, fox ears and 9 fluffy tails, whereas Hinata was a cat with lavender ears and tail that were tipped with ink blue fur, while Konan changed adding blue wolf ears and a curled tail with a white tip to her form. Agreeing that their forms looked good they changed back to their normal selves and got into position.

'_It's time, Kyuubi!' _Naruto said as he felt the Kyuubi quickly give him huge amounts of chakra and started forming three tails instantly but staying sane. Naruto then spotted Yamato running from a distance just as Temari's bird had landed. _'This is too much fun' _Naruto thought as he let out a roar that scared the birds from the trees and had two perverts running to stop his rampage.

"Kuso, what happened?" Jiraiya asked as he saw his once in control ex-pupil turned into a raged-filled three tailed mini fox whose fourth tail seemed to be forming. Konan, eyes wide in mock fear said she was defending Jiraiya's honor after Naruto talked about him and said that he would never be able to stand up to him.

"After that, he drank something from a weird vial, saying the Kyuubi will gain control and then his eyes changed and the nine-tail's chakra formed three tails instantly" Konan said stepping back as the fourth chakra tail formed and she knew the power it held. Just as Yamato came forth, Naruto slashed at him and sending him back about 50 feet and out of sight, which in fact was just a wood clone.

'_Phase one is complete, now it's your turn, baa-chan'_ Naruto thought as he saw the busty Hokage come forth.

"Naruto, stop this at once before you destroy Konoha" Tsunade said sounding angry although she was secretly enjoying the look on Jiraiya's face as he thought Naruto really lost it. Naruto then tried to attack Tsunade who dodged it and punched the ground underneath him. Jumping back, he sent his arms underground that headed for Tsunade as they planned. Watching the fight, Jiraiya and Kakashi missed when Konan, Hinata, and a Naruto clone slipped over to where Sasori was to hand him a veil in exchange for two small pieces of paper. Smiling they got back into position just as Naruto grabbed Tsunade's leg.

"NO!" Jiraiya screamed as he ran to grab Tsunade who was supposedly thrown at him, while Konan and Hinata ran at Naruto with seal tags.

"We'll stop him" they both shouted as they placed the tags on him just as a smoke bomb thrown by Kiba exploded to cover the fact that the seals were fakes. All three faked a scream as they changed into the three beautiful girls each with animal ears and a tails. Naruto had his red-orange fox ears and 9 fluffy tails that flickered every now and then, Hinata's cat ears were lavender with white tips like the tail that curled and uncurled, and Konan had grown a pair of blue wolf ears and a wagging tail.

'_Phase two is complete now let's see if he takes the bait'_ Naruto thought as they waited for the smoke to clear and watch the pervert's head roll. Elsewhere, in the Hokage mansion, Konohamaru and others were watching and enjoying the show below.

"That's Naruto-niichan for you, always got a major trick up his sleeve, _kore_" Konohamaru said laughing as he noticed the animal features on the girls.

"He truly deserves the title of Konoha's number one prankster" Neji said keeping lookout as Sasuke and Sai planted the hidden cameras all over the room for phase CONNED.

"That's Naruto for you, always doing the unexpected and doing it big" Sasuke said as he finished putting up his share of the cameras.

"Yes, he does everything big, unlike his penis" Sai said with a smile on his face as Sasuke and Neji sweat dropped at the odd comment as Konohamaru glared at him.

"Okay, everything is set up here. Phase CONNED is complete and moving out" Konohamaru stated into his mike to his two team-mates as they went to set the other two phases into place.

"Konohamaru said that they're done with their part and are leaving now" Udon informed the people he was with.

"How troublesome, why doesn't he just confront him and get it over with?" Shikamaru sighed as he helped set up Phase KNOCKOUT in the forest with Kisame, Itachi, Sakura, Karin, Tenten, Suigetsu, and Shino, who were setting up the scene and traps.

"Because it's Naruto we are talking about. He never takes the easy way out." Sakura told Shikamaru as she made craters with her fist and have Tenten make a spike pit in some and Kisame fill water in the others. Itachi and Shikamaru were setting up ninja wire that would set off traps to capture Kakashi and get rid of his ninja dogs.

"Hey Chouji, you okay up there?" Shikamaru called out to his team-mate who was up high in the tree.

"Yea, just waiting for Kakashi to step into the trap and hoist him up as according to plan." Chouji replied rope tied around his waist to keep from slipping.

"Hmph, it's about time that pervert got what's coming to him" Karin said setting up the fluffy blankets and pillows for Naruto, Hinata, and Konan's scene. "Suigetsu, how are you doing over there?" Karin called out looking toward the pond where Suigetsu was hiding.

"Good, I'm got the lighting and hidden camcorders set up" he said, head popping up out of the water.

"…we are done with our part. Let's go. The others are going to make their way here soon" Shino said calmly, recalling his bugs and heading for the trees. Nodding Udon informed the others that their phase was a go and they were retreating.

"It's up to your group Moegi to set your phase because it's the most critical part of the plan" Udon says before leaving to join the others and watch the show.

"Roger that, Udon and Konohamaru" Moegi told into the mike as her team made up of Ino, Asuma, Kurenai, Anko, Hanabi, and Shizune were at _Ichiraku Ramen_ putting Phase DATE, the most important phase to plan.

"Okay, are you two ready?" Anko asked Asuma and Kurenai who were to stay at _Ichiraku Ramen_ during the phase.

"Yes, we got Iruka to baby-sit and are able to stay here until phase DATE starts and ends" Asuma and Kurenai stated as Hanabi stood as look out waiting for Phase DATE to begin.

"There he is" Hanabi said making everybody look at the Naruto clone running towards them with a vile in his hand.

"Is this right?" Ino asked taking the vial and handing it to Shizune for final say if the plant she gave them would be usable. The room was filled with tension as she examined the vial. Smiling, she nodded and said that phase DATE was a go. Cheering everybody started moving as Kiba and Akamaru came to inform them that Kakashi was caught and they were getting ready for phase DATE. Hanabi, Ino, and Kiba quickly left as Shizune set an order for two teas and two bowls of ramen to be made later for Jiraiya and Tsunade. Anko then brought out a special dango, filled with sleep powder that she placed next to one of the cups and quickly left with Shizune.

"Remember, Teuchi-sama to give Jiraiya the bowl of ramen with the ingredient from the vial in it. Nodding, he said he would do anything to help his number one customer and begun to put phase DATE in action.


	3. Naruto's Final Hour

To Be Young Again-Chapter Three

_Naruto's Final Hour_

"Are you okay, Tsunade?" Jiraiya asked as he caught Tsunade when Naruto threw her.

"Yes, I'm fine. Thank you" Tsunade answered as she got up on her feet, trying hard not to shudder at Jiraiya's touch. "Who are you anyway?" she asked seeming suspicious as she pretend to look closely at his face.

"I'm Yuusu, the nephew of-"

Before he could finish, Kakashi, Jiraiya, and Tsunade all turned when they heard screaming and saw smoke.

"Ittai?" Jiraiya said watching as the smoke started to clear and noticed three bodies. The two perverts gaped as they saw the girls and their animal traits.

"NANI?" Tsunade said out loud as she held in a laugh as she saw Jiraiya's and Kakashi's face expressions when they noticed the kunoichi.

"What happened to us?" Konan and Hinata asked looking at their tails and feeling the ears on their heads.

"You tried to seal me while I was merging" Naruto said in a deep feminine voice meant to sound like two people. "My body was merging with my vessel and my power seeped out causing the both of you to transform too" Naruto said with an evil laugh that sent chills down Kakashi's and Jiraiya's spines.

"Change us back" the girls pleaded getting teary eyed from trying hard not to laugh which fit perfectly with the moment. Naruto shook his head.

"I can't for it seems it brought out your inner animal and is irreversible. From now on my name will be '_Kyuto_' and you two will be part of my new female harem" Naruto screamed and using his tails grabbed the two kunoichi who couldn't hold in their laughter much longer and started running towards the woods where Phase KNOCKOUT was about to begin. The perverts, still in shock, snapped at of it when they heard Tsunade curse saying what happen to Naruto. Temari spoke up just then and said that Yuusu said something mean to Naruto and that's what had led to the transformation. Glaring at Jiraiya, who was backing away quickly, she told him that since he was the cause of the problem that he had to go fix it.

"You go too Kakashi and assist in any way you can" Tsunade ordered wanting to make sure the other phases were set into place. Nodding, the duo quickly sprinted off in the direction that Naruto went with the girls. Watching them leave until they were out of sight, Tsunade smirked and went over to Sasori and Temari who was watching the show from the sidelines.

"Please, tell me you got all that on camcorder?" Tsunade asked talking to the puppet Sasori was in. The puppet opened up and out came Sasori with a camcorder in his hand and the hint of a grin on his face.

"Every last bit" he said handing the camcorder to her just as Deidara landed with Kankuro who was laughing and undoing the chakra strings attached to Tsunade that controlled her to fly directly at Jiraiya.

"Got some good air shots too, un" Deidara said tossing Tsunade a camera that was linked to the scope he wore over his eye. Smiling, she turned it on and instantly laughed at the horrified faces of Jiraiya as he watched Naruto's rampage.

"These are priceless, I'm going to hang these up in my office" she said as everybody who was part of Naruto's scheme came to inform her that everything was a go. "Okay everybody head toward the Academy, into the meeting room and watch the show unfold the hidden cameras are picking up. I'm going to go ahead with Deidara and Shikamaru to quickly catch up with Jiraiya and make sure Kakashi is caught and explain to him what's happening" Tsunade told them as they group made their way to the Academy as she, Deidara, and Shikamaru jumped on the bird and caught up with Jiraiya and Kakashi who was about to make it to '_Kyuto's scene_.' As soon as Naruto ran off with the girls, all three started laughing as they couldn't hold it in much longer.

"**I like the name and story you chose Kit, now run around for a bit so the others can get settled to watch the show…and you three can get the giggles out"** Kyuubi said, although he was secretly laughing too.

'_Right'_ Naruto thought and told the girls what he was about to do and said to hold out on the animal parts a little longer.

"That's fine although how are you going to make the harem scene believable because Nagato and Yahiko will come after you if you tried anything" Konan said looking at Naruto who she saw like a brother.

"Hmm" Naruto said, running around the forest to throw the perverts off their trail. Thinking of something, the group heard Hinata gasped and blushed as she played with her index fingers muttering something under her breath. With his acute hearing, Naruto heard her and nearly stopped in surprise. "Where did you get that idea, although I really like but should we…well, Hiashi did just approve our marriage so that should work. I just hope Neji doesn't kill me later" Naruto said as he filled Konan in on Hinata's plan. Back at the gates Izumo and Kotetsu, who were laughing and talking about the events that just happened with Naruto and the girls, spotted four people making their way over to them.

"Hello, my youthful friends" Gai said giving them his good guy pose and gleaming teeth.

"I'm back from my missions our youthful Hokage has sent me on and was told to meet you as for my next assignment."

As Izumo and Kotetsu was about to speak, Lee noticed all the damage in the street.

"What happened to Konoha while we were away?" he asked noticing the craters and deep holes where Naruto arms had been.

"Is Konan okay?" Nagato and Yahiko asked, concerned for their team mate and friend.

"Everything is fine. All will be explained when we get to the Academy" the guards said standing and quickly making their way there with Gai, Lee, Nagato, and Yahiko on their tail.

"He has to be around here somewhere?" Jiraiya said out of breath from having to chase Naruto all through the forest. His throat was becoming itchy and he was out of water.

"The scents keep overlapping so it's hard to pinpoint which path is the right one?" Pakkun said as he and his fellow dog pack split up trying to find where the furry kunoichi went. Up ahead, a yelp was heard as one of the dogs suddenly disappeared into the ground. Jumping ahead, they noticed the dog disappeared and where he should have been a giant pit filled with kunai at the bottom.

"We must be getting close" Jiraiya said as Kakashi lifted his forehead protector to reveal his sharingan. They all went forward and watched as all of Kakashi's summoning dogs vanished in pits either filled with kunai or water until only Pakkun was left. Pakkun then hitched a ride on Kakashi, saying he was safer there. All three then heard running water and sounds of a struggle as they got nearer. Not paying attention, Kakashi missed when the sand around his feet shifted and made him trip, setting off a wire that was attached to a net which fell on him. Struggling to get out, he didn't realized the net was coated with a sticky substance that stuck his hands to the net unable to do jutsus. Pakkun sighed and said that Jiraiya was bad luck and to be avoided as they were hosted high in the air by Chouji, who was using his expansion ability, unable to break free.

"Go ahead and stop Naruto" Kakashi called out, ashamed that he was caught in a trap. Nodding, Jiraiya went ahead and out of sight just as Tsunade jumped down and landed on a branch in the tree Kakashi was trapped in. Smiling, she told Kakashi that he was lucky that he wasn't Jiraiya right now. Eyes wide, Kakashi watch as Gaara and Chouji, still holding the rope to the trap, come out of hiding as Deidara flew down with Shikamaru who then begin to explain what was happening. Sighing, Kakashi just shook his head and smiled.

"You right, I'm glad I'm not him right now. I told him that he better not let Naruto find out or it will come to bite him in the ass. I was right."

Laughing, they let Kakashi down and helped him out of the trap.

"So what do we do now?" he asked covering his eye once more.

"Easy…you five will go watch the show at the Academy while I get ready to set the last two phases into action."

Nodding, the group flew off to the building just as a giant shadow fell on Tsunade.

"Hinata this has to be the most diabolic idea you ever had and I love you for it" Naruto said giving her a quick kiss as he created a shadow clone to look like Konan's animal form and they start putting on the clothes left for them to change into hidden in Naruto's fox backpack. Hearing giggling, they looked up at the trees where Konan was working the hidden lights as Suigetsu was hiding in the water, making sure the hidden camcorders were functional and getting set for his part.

"They're all set and working" he said, head popping out of the water.

"Good, now go up stream a bit until you see Konan give you the signal that the pervert is moving towards the water. Then start sending the numbing powder down so when he drinks it will affect him almost instantly that way he won't be able to pay close attention to the lights and think it's his imagination."

Nodding, Suigetsu did just that as Konan started setting the special lamps lined with scented paper on fire which gave the area a misty and mysterious feel to it.

"I hope baa-chan doesn't get here too quickly" Naruto stated as the group waved to Deidara and the others as they head off to watch the show. Seeing the large shadow, Tsunade gasped and turned around to come face to face with…

"Raikage, Bee, what are you two doing here?" she asked looking at the lightning country's leader who was joined by his brother, the host of the eight-tails, Bee.

"We were coming to visit Konoha when we felt a large chakra spike from nearby and decided to see if anybody needed help" Raikage said as he looked around for trouble. Smiling, Tsunade shook her head and said there was no trouble, just a revenge prank.

'_Revenge on who we like to know. Cuz best for the job, be my boy Naruto. Yeah'_ Bee rapped earning a sigh from his brother. Chuckling, Tsunade informed them of the plan and asked if they wanted to help. _'Aw yea, this is Naruto we talking 'bout so it's going to be fun. This prank will go down in history as Konoha's number one.'_

Shaking his head at his brother's rapping, Raikage just smiled and said that they would join. All three quickly made their way to where Naruto was putting phase three into play.

"**He's almost here so it's time to get into position"** Kyuubi said, manifesting a bowl of popcorn and a soda in Naruto's mind as he waited for the show to start.

"Perfect, now it's time to work the lights Konan as Kyuubi senses him coming closer" Naruto said as he slashed at the ground while his clone and Hinata suddenly splash themselves with water as if to seem as if they tried to escape by water and quickly leaving foot prints heading away from the scene. Just then Jiraiya, out of breath and thirsty, came into the clearing and stopped in his tracks. He noticed the area with the crumpled pillows, claw marks on the ground, and wet footprints leading away that he made it to the right place.

'_But where are Naruto and the kunoichi?'_ he thought looking around but not seeing anybody as Konan signaled Suigetsu to spike the water. Cursing himself, he made his way over to the stream just as the medicine had reached his location. Not bothering to use the canteen or his hands, he dipped his head straight in the water and drank up almost all the medicine as Konan sweat dropped and signaled to them that he took the bait. Suigetsu then slid out of the water and up the tree to where Konan was as Naruto, his clone, and Hinata got ready to go back to the clearing.

"**It's Showtime"** Kyuubi said chuckling as Naruto carried Hinata and his clone back to the clearing and to an unsuspected Jiraiya.

Izumo, Kotetsu, Gai, Lee, Nagato, and Yahiko all made it to the Academy meeting room to find almost everybody involved with Naruto's scheme already there laughing and waiting for the show to start.

"What's going on?" the group asked as they stepped into the room. All looking at the door, Neji informed his former team-mate and sensei plus Nagato and Yahiko about Naruto's revenge prank. The four were in shock at how badly Naruto wanted revenge on Jiraiya for trying to swindle him out of his ramen.

"It's just ramen there is no need to go overboard" Yahiko said not really knowing Naruto that long. Everybody in the room shook their heads at the naïve orange-haired rain ninja.

"You haven't known Naruto that long so you don't understand what ramen is to him" Kakashi said remembering all the times that Naruto talked about ramen, which was most of the time.

"Besides, this isn't just about the ramen it's about the fact that Jiraiya was going to go back on his word" Sasuke said, remembering all the times Naruto went after him saying he was going to keep his promise to bring him back no matter what.

"Not to mention how big a pervert Jiraiya is, I mean spying on us girls and roping Naruto in with the idea of free ramen when he knew he couldn't resist" Sakura said gaining nods from all the kunoichi in the room.

"That still seems a little harsh to pull a prank this elaborate just to extract revenge" Yahiko said who used to looked up to the pervert when he was younger while Nagato shook in head in agreement.

"This should be enough proof for you two" Hanabi said from the door, joined by Hiashi and Ino's father. Going over to them, she pulled out Jiraiya's notepad that he had dropped chasing Naruto and showed them the pictures of Sakura, Ino, Karin, Tenten, Anko, Hinata, Temari, Tsunade, Shizune, and every other female he ever spied on.

"Well, uh, I mean," Yahiko said trying to find some kind of argument to defend his former perverted sensei while Nagato frowned and said nothing as he realized the truth. Sighing, Hanabi turned the notepad towards her and flipped to the last thing Jiraiya had drawn.

"Do you think Naruto was wrong now?" Hanabi asked as she handed the group the notepad with a picture of the three animal formed kunoichi that was surrounded by a drawn picture of Jiraiya and his perverted grin. The room was silent as Nagato and Yahiko looked at the drawing of their team-mate and their ex-sensei. Looking up, Yahiko handed Hanabi back the notepad, took a seat in the front row, and asked somebody to pass the popcorn because he was going to enjoy this. All agreeing, they sat and watch as Naruto make his way back to the clearing.

'_Wow, I feel weird. I must have used too much chakra when chasing Naruto'_ Jiraiya thought as the medicine began to take effect and he started feeling numb. He made his way over to a tree where he sat down, back to the tree looking at the pillows and cushions.

'_I failed as a ninja to stop Naruto all because I was too suspicious of him, thinking he told on me. Now look what he had done, he's merged with the nine tails, gone and taken Hyuuga Hiashi's oldest daughter and stolen one of my former students. I can never go back to Konoha or the Ame_ _now'_ Jiraiya thought looking at the scene in front as if mocking him.

"I wonder why the pillows and lamps are around anyway?" he wondered out loud as he turned his head hearing the sound of heavy footsteps approaching him. Standing up clumsily, he got into an attack pose just as Kyuto walked on the water, 7 of the 9 tails covering her body while the other two was carrying Konan and Hinata as he…or she as his mind reminded him…laid them down on the pillows. Kyuto then sat in the middle of the pile as Konan and Hinata seem to be bowing to her.

'_That's it, I lost my mind'_ Jiraiya thought as he watched Kyuto used her tails to lift the necks of Hinata and Konan as she looked at him. The fogginess from the lamps seemed to make the light around the scene glow with different colors which was actually Konan's doing as Jiraiya started paying attention to Kyuto and what she was saying and doing.

"Like what you see Jiraiya or should I say _Yuusu…_" Kyuto was saying as she crossed one leg over the other, body stilled covered by her tails. "Welcome to my domain, it seems you manage to get by all my traps but have drunk from the stream and therefore are easily within my control" Kyuto said an evil smile on her face as she removed her tails from her body and begin to rub Hinata's and Konan's ears earning purrs and tail wagging from both kunoichi.

"Mistress" they both chanted as if under some kind of spell as the tails begin to massage them everywhere. Jiraiya just stood there in shock as he watched Kyuto use her tails to grope and mess with the two girl's body.

'_If this is a dream, I don't want to wake up'_ Jiraiya thinks as his nose starts bleeding from the exciting view. Smiling, Kyuto stopped fondling the girls earning her whines of protest. Tapping them gently on the head with her tails Kyuto spoke.

"Those who drink from the stream are under my control to do whatever I say…I will show you how."

'_I hope Neji doesn't kill me after what I'm about to do, although it was Hinata's idea, but I won't tell him that. I wonder where she came up with the idea though. I really hope that Hiashi doesn't find out because I know I wouldn't last the rest of the phase.'_

"**Kit, you are truly the bravest and most foolish ninja to do what you have planned. I bow to you in your final hour." **

"Wow, he plays a better pimp than I thought" Sakura said looking at how Naruto played the role of a female.

"Actually, Sakura I think the right term for this situation is domatrix" Tenten said wondering where Naruto learned all the stuff he was doing.

"What is doing with my daughter?" Hiashi asked looking at Neji, who was just as confused as Hiashi was.

"I don't know. He didn't tell me about this part because it he did he wouldn't be living right now" Neji said his byakugan activating in his anger as they watched Naruto do the last thing any of them expected.

"Naruto, I believe you spent too much time with Jiraiya and his perverted ways has changed you" Nagato said, looking at the scene with wide eyes.

"Konan, NOOOO" Yahiko wailed as he watched the show that was taking place in front of him.

"That brat got guts to have those girls do that with all the hidden camcorders around" Tsunade said watching the show from one of the trees.

"I hope he knows what he's doing and if not…I suggest you hide him in lightning country or somewhere far away" Raikage said shaking his head at the gutsy blonde who didn't know of the danger he was putting himself in.

"_Naruto is cool, he know how to get the girls, and taking that pervert's mind for a little twirl, yeah"_ Bee rapped quietly as he saw Naruto's knowing smirk and knew he had something planned.

"Hinata-chan and Konan-san, if you will, pleasure me in the highest of ways" Kyuto said, almost flinching at the thought of what Neji will do to him later when Phase KNOCKOUT was over. Blinking, both girls started to move in front of Kyuto where they started to kiss each other on the mouth, moaning and groaning as if really enjoying the moment. Naruto had to use every ounce of his self-control to not watch Hinata make out with his clone that was made to look at Konan or look up at Konan and see her reaction to the show. Jiraiya's mouth just hung open and the blood gushing out of his nose as the scene in front of him was heating up. The girls started to touch and grope each other very much in the same manner as Kyuto's tails were a few minutes ago.

'_He's about to pass out good. Took him long enough but it seems I will have to do "that" after all. That should do the trick and most likely get me killed... at least my final wish before death was to…'_

"Please tell me he's not going to do what I think he's about to do" Ino said, eyes widening as she watches what she called _'Naruto's final prank in life.'_

"Somebody go and start making his tombstone and have it say, _'Here lies Naruto, went out with a bang because he and two girls b-'_" Deidara started but got hit by Temari who said that wasn't funny as Kankuro was trying to hide his snicker and nosebleed. Gaara stayed motionless as he looked at the screen, curiosity shown on his face as Sasuke whispered something to Itachi who nodded and quickly left the room with Kisame in tow. Hanabi was silently chanting 'go sis go' as Neji and Hiashi were about ready to kill Naruto when he was done.

"I might have to rethink about the marriage between those two if he dares have my daughter doing that kind of stuff out in the open" Hiashi said already imagining how he was going to torture him to the fullest extent.

"All I know is that better not make Hinata-sama do anything worse or he will pay" Neji stated as he and everybody else wait to see what Naruto's final big moment was. Nagato and Yahiko got up from their seats and started heading for the door.

"We need to have a little "talk" with Naruto and Konan when this is over" they were saying to each other until they heard Naruto say something that nearly made their heart stops.

"Hinata-chan, Konan-san, as my final gift before I finish this pervert off, I would like to-"

And that is when the second biggest rampage, the first being the Kyuubi attacking Konoha, broke loose in the meeting room. Everybody was making a break for the exit as Hiashi, Neji, Nagato, and Yahiko left quickly to go and kill the blonde while the others followed to try and prevent it.

"**NARUTO**" they called out as some kind of battle cry as they all headed for the clearing they were in. Tsunade, Raikage, and Bee wore shocked expressions as they were left speechless as they heard what Naruto told the girls to do. Hearing rustling, they looked down and saw Itachi and Kisame motion to them just as they heard a faint cry of "Naruto" in the distance. Eyes widening, they quickly made their way down just in time to see four pissed-off shinobi in the distant making their way over to kill a certain blonde.

"I might just have to take you up on that offer Raikage. Kami, help us" Tsunade said as she, Raikage, Bee, Itachi, and Kisame went to try to stall the four angry males until Naruto could make his escape.

"Hinata-chan, Konan-san, as my final gift before I finish this pervert off, I would like to have a threesome" Naruto said as he watched Jiraiya's eyes go wide as all three girls begin to take off their clothes, that's when Jiraiya's perverted mind couldn't handle no more and he went flying back high in the air and into the stream where the last thing he heard before passing out was Tsunade screaming "Naruto" and loud roaring.

'_Be safe, Tsunade'_ Jiraiya thinks just as he passes out thinking that Tsunade was attacking Naruto to protect him when in actuality she was protecting Naruto from Hiashi and Neji.

"**Don't just stand there brat. Hurry up, change and then…RUN. Grab Hinata, the bag, and get your ass moving!" **Kyuubi was screaming in Naruto's head as they saw the four rampaging shinobi headed their way only to be temporarily stopped by Tsunade and A while Bee was stopping Nagato and Yahiko who got pass by the two Kages. Quickly changing into normal clothes, Naruto and Hinata watched as Nagato and Yahiko escaped, rage filled in their eyes as they advanced on Naruto. Seeing that Jiraiya was cleanly knocked out, Konan and Suigetsu quickly came out of hiding as Yahiko and Nagato joined the battle. Suigetsu was moving Jiraiya up on dry land on the other side of the bank as Konan went to calm Yahiko and Nagato down and explain what happened. Seeing that Konan was in front of them and fully clothed, they watched as the Konan clone changed back into a Naruto clone before disappearing and calmed down, glad that Naruto wasn't like Jiraiya after all. Hiashi and Neji, on the other hand, weren't listening as they broke free of Tsunade's grasp and ran after the poor blonde who grabbed the backpack with the clothes in it, handed to Hinata who put it on, grabbed Hinata, carried her on his back, and used the Kyuubi's chakra to quickly jump through the trees with Hiashi and Neji chasing them, who then had Tenten, Sakura, Sasuke, Itachi, Kisame, Kakashi, Gai, Lee, Kiba, and Akamaru following behind, whether to stop Hiashi and Neji or have a chance at trying to kill Naruto nobody knew. The others were about to join when Naruto suddenly jumped high in the air to land on Gaara's sand and safely placed on the back of a clay bird with Sasori, Deidara and the Sand siblings who then made their way back to Konoha with the group hot on their trail. Looking at the Raikage and Bee, she asked if they could help by making sure Naruto stayed away from the Hyuugas until she could deal with them. Nodding in understanding, A and B quickly made their way to Konoha while Suigetsu and Konan quickly cleaned up the area with help from Yahiko and Nagato, who felt bad for trying to attack Naruto. Grabbing the gear and leaving only the pillows and lamps, the four left for Konoha just as Jiraiya was waking up.

As Jiraiya got up and looked around, spotting the cushions, lamps, and footprints in the dirt, he noticed Tsunade and smiled, tears forming in his eyes.

"My sweet Tsunade, you have saved me from certain death. Please let me take you out on a date as a reward for stopping Naruto" Jiraiya said still half numb from the drug and not paying attention as he didn't notice that Tsunade didn't have a scratch on her clothes or there were more footprints then there should have been. Realizing, that Jiraiya didn't see Hiashi and everybody and believed she stopped Naruto, she secretly smiled realizing that Phase DATE was a go and about to start.

"I would honor my team-mate's nephew in a date for going through the trouble of rescuing two kunoichi in distress. Standing up, Jiraiya made his way back to Konoha with Tsunade, taking the long route, as to give everybody enough time to do something about Naruto and his Hyuuga problem. None of them however saw when someone from the shadows quickly dove into the water and came out with a shiny ring in their hand.

"Yes, the final part of extracting my revenge" Naruto's shadow clone said as he pocketed the ring that Jiraiya was wearing until it slipped off his finger when he fell in the water and hid until it was time to give it to Naruto.

_Naruto's greatest revenge prank _

While Jiraiya, who returned to Konoha with Tsunade and arranged their date at _Ichiraku Ramen_, was getting ready, Tsunade made her way to the Academy to help Naruto and Hinata who were trying to calm down a furious Neji and Hiashi that were trapped in a chakra-blocking room. As soon as she walked toward the door however she heard arguing from Naruto and Hinata who seemed to want to take the blame.

"Naruto-kun didn't have anything to do with that. It was actually-"

"Hinata-chan is just trying to protect me. She wasn't invo-"

"Naruto-kun, I'm not going to let you take the bla-"

"Hinata-chan you have too much to lose while I don't-"

"You could lose me, Naruto-kun" Hinata cried out just as Tsunade walked through the door. Naruto and everybody in the room went quiet after that outburst in which Naruto sighed and looked into Hinata's eyes.

"Either way, I will lose you Hinata-chan, but I will always cherish what we had. I belong to no one but you and I always will" Naruto said giving her a quick kiss on the forehead as she started crying.

"…would someone please explain to me what was happening?" Hiashi asked calming down after seeing how much Naruto cared for his daughter, although still angry at the scene in the forest.

"That's what I would like to know" Tsunade said closing the door behind her and looking at the two lovebirds.

"Well" is all they both had time to say before there was a knock on the door and Tsunade let Konan, Yahiko, and Nagato in, who were all out of breath from running to find them.

"Let me explain what happened" Konan said ignoring the protest from Naruto who kept saying it was his fault. Having Raikage and Bee restrain Naruto, Konan quickly explained that Naruto wanted to make the scene believable and that Hinata had suggested the kissing. At first, Naruto agreed saying it was a good idea until Hinata told the full plan and he started to disagree. Hinata then gave the idea of shadow clones but Naruto said that he couldn't get the two girls kissing scene right and that would have thrown it off, so they agreed to make a Konan shadow clone and Hinata play the part.

"Since they were getting married soon, they thought it was okay. They didn't know the hidden camcorders were looking at them too or that Jiraiya wouldn't pass out until that last bit they were hoping he would be knocked out sooner" Konan finished explaining as everybody in the room was quiet except for Hinata's silent cries of 'I'm losing Naruto'. Hiashi and Neji looked at the two in question as Naruto was holding and rubbing Hinata's back as she cried. Sighing, Hiashi said that there wasn't going to be any punishment and that they were able to still get married. Hinata then looked at her father and quickly went and hugged him, thanking him repeatedly. Neji just glared at Naruto and shook his head saying that he better not let him hear about Hinata doing anything similar to what they saw or he will hunt him down and torture him slowly and painfully.

"I've got one question though, where did you get the idea for the forest scene?" Hiashi said looking at Naruto who seemed confused.

"Actually, I didn't come up with phase three, Hinata did" Naruto said, seeing that Hinata wasn't going to get in trouble, as he looked at her because he too was curious on where she got the idea.

"It was in this book I read that Neji niisan gave me right before he went on that week-long mission" Hinata said wondering why it was such a big deal.

"Wait a minute, I never gave you a book, let alone a book with any ideas like that" Neji said quickly as Hiashi started glaring at him.

"It was in the package you gave me right before you left. You said something about delivery and handed to me so I thought it was for me" Hinata said staring at her cousin, who mouth was hanging open.

"But-wait, Naruto gave me that package and told me to deliver it but I was in a hurry and gave it to you and told you it was a delivery" Neji said and then everybody turned to Naruto who was dead quiet and had a faint blush on his face.

"…first I think everybody but Hiashi-sama and Bee better leave the room" Naruto said a blush on his cheeks. They all looked at Naruto who kept his mouth shut as if not to say another word until they all did. Sighing, everybody except Bee, who would be there just in case Hiashi went crazy, again, left the room.

"Now explain to me how it was possible for Hinata to get a book with inappropriate material in it" Hiashi asked angrily waiting to see what kind of excuse he would come up with. Breathing out slowly, Naruto went and explained his view of the chain reaction of how the book went from Naruto to Hinata.

"Okay, Hinata got a package believing it was hers and opened and found the book, but the package was given to her by Neji, who was leaving for a mission, and asked her to deliver it but misheard. I gave Neji the package to deliver, not to Hinata…but you" Naruto said waiting for what was about to come next.

"ME" Hiashi roared and advanced toward the blonde only to be stop by a arm from Killer Bee. "Why would you deliver such material to me?" he asked ready to tackle the blonde if he had to. Naruto's blush deepened as he quickly opened the door and asked the group to go down the hall, as they gave him very questioning looks. After they left, Naruto answered Hiashi unable to look him in the eye.

"Remember the first time I asked to date Hinata-chan and you threw everything within reach at me, well, that book I sent was one of those things. It said property of Hyuuga Hiashi in the back so I decided to return it to you. The name of the book was-"

The group down the hall was wondering if everything was okay until they heard a door open and Naruto, Hiashi, and Bee came walking out, the first two with big blushes on their face and Bee chuckling about wanting to borrow that book. Noticing the group, Hiashi cleared his throat, said everything was cleared up, and asked Hinata what she did with the book.

"Oh, it's still in my room on my bookshelf. I haven't finished it yet, I still have one more chapter to read" she said as she noticed her father blushing. Calling Neji, Hiashi then left asking him to go and retrieve the book and bring it to his office.

"What was that all about?" Tsunade asked noticing the blush on Naruto and Hiashi's faces. Shaking his head he said, looking at Hinata, "I can't tell you. It's not in my place to tell" he said and taking Hinata's hand left the chakra-blocking chamber. Looking at Bee who had a small smile on his face she waited till the lovebirds had left to ask him what happened. Bee, unlike Naruto, gladly told everything as they made their way outside and to the Hokage Mansion where Tsunade got ready for her date. Naruto and Hinata went back to the clearing where they did the kunoichi harem scene. What they weren't expecting was to see Gaara there looking at the stuff as they approached.

"Hey Gaara, what are you doing here?" he asked his silent friend who still haven't turned around.

"…can I ask you a question?" Gaara asked finally turning around to look at the fox vessel and Hinata curiosity shown in his eyes. "What was this phase all about?" he asked trying to understand why everybody was making a big deal out of it.

"Phase KNOCKOUT was to lure Jiraiya and Kakashi out here so we could capture Kakashi, explain the prank to him, and set Jiraiya up for phase four" Naruto explained looking around as if searching for somebody. Gaara had a confused look on his face at Naruto's answer so he turned to Hinata.

"Hinata-san, can you explain to me the thing you were doing with Naruto's clone because when I asked Temari she blushed and told me to ask Kankuro. I went to ask Kankuro and he got this scared look on his face and told me to ask Temari. When I told him she told me to ask him, he said that maybe Deidara or Sasori could answer and quickly ran away. I then found the both of them arguing about their art and asked them about that scene, where both were quiet for a change and looked at each other. They then suggested I go to the scene and see if I could figure it out, but I still don't understand. Can you help me?" he asked as Naruto made his way over to the stream where his clone was waiting behind a tree to give him the ring. Realizing what Gaara was asking, Hinata blushed big-time as she begin to play with her index fingers and start muttering, "uh-well, you see, um," was all that came out. Naruto came back over to where Hinata was blushing and Gaara still had a confused look on his face.

"What's the matter, Hinata-chan?" Naruto asked as he noticed she went back into her old habit of playing with her fingers. Blushing, she then told Naruto what Gaara had asked her and waited for him to respond to the question. Blinking, Naruto smiled and said that he will explain what a harem was as he made a hand sign and said, "Kage Bushin no Jutsu." Kankuro, Temari, Sasori, and Deidara were all waiting at the gates of Konoha so they could make their way back to Suna.

"Where is Gaara?" Kankuro wondered out loud as they looked around for the gourd wearing red-head.

"I never seen him as the kind of person to keep others waiting" Sasori said, messing with his puppet Hiruko.

"If it makes you mad, I'll gladly wait for him, un" Deidara muttered lowly under his breath where thankfully no one heard him. Just then the group spotted Gaara, Naruto, and Hinata coming out of the forest in front of them.

"There you are, Gaara. Are you ready to go?" Temari asked looking at her brother who appeared to be deep in thought. Nodding, he climbed aboard the back of the clay bird which had spread its wings and took off with Naruto and Hinata waving goodbye.

"Do you think Gaara is okay with you using shadow clones to act out a harem, Naruto-kun?" Hinata asked turning and following Naruto who started walking at a fast pace toward the ramen shop.

"Yea, I'm sure he is fine, in fact he seemed quite interested in the harem" Naruto answered as he quickly made a henge and went to the backdoor of the ramen shop and knocked three times. Cursing, Jiraiya trashed his temporary apartment looking for the ring.

'_Where is it? Where is it?'_ he thought frantically as he searched every nook and cranny of Naruto's apartment. _'No. I can't have lost it. Why does this happen to me?'_ he thought sadly as he gives up on the ring and changes his clothing.

"But at least I finally get a date with Tsunade" he says with a perverted grin on his face. "Happiest day of my life" as he made a henge to look like his younger self and headed out to _Ichiraku Ramen_ for his date with Tsunade. "Even if she found out the truth, I finally got my wish" he said whistling as he goes to famous ramen shop.

"You ready to go Teuchi oyaji-san?" Naruto asked when the shop owner opened the door to let Naruto and Hinata in. Nodding, he smiled when he saw Naruto pull the ring out of his pocket.

"It seems it's time for my end of the bargain" Teuchi says as he pulled out a fat envelope and handed it to Naruto, who put it away in his fox backpack. Taking the ring off his finger he exchanged it for the ring on his hand.

"Thanks oyaji-san" Naruto said placing the ring in his pocket before giving him one of his famous grins.

"No, thank you for you have given me the perfect opportunity to finally get revenge on that old pervert" Teuchi said patting Naruto on the head. Ayame came into the kitchen, greeted Naruto and Hinata to tell her father that Tsunade was here for her date and to set Phase DATE into action. Nodding, he was about to go fix the food when Naruto stopped him and gave him a scroll before leaving. Curious, Teuchi read the scroll, eyes widening, and chuckled as he passed on the message to Tsunade, who grinned and asked Asuma and Kurenai to deliver something for her after they left.

"This prank will truly go down in Konoha history" Tsunade told Teuchi who chuckled and asked for a copy of the tape just as Jiraiya walked through the door. Phase DATE went well as Asuma and Kurenai was describing to the group who was in the meeting room waiting for the final phase to start.

"Jiraiya ate the spiked food, dango, and tea filled with sleeping powder and chakra-blocking medicine as was planned and then took her to the sake bar. He then kept buying sake for the both of them until both were almost too drunk to walk straight. Then Tsunade asked to go the bathroom and when she came back they went to her room" Asuma and Kurenai was explaining as the group in front of them were giddy with laughter as the final part of Naruto's elaborate and complex scheme was about to end.

"So did he notice?" Shizune asked just as the door opened and in came Tsunade who was grinning from ear to ear.

"Nope and right now I bet he is waiting in my room thinking he's going to get lucky."

All the kunoichi shuddered and giggled at the thought of Jiraiya waiting for Tsunade who was not coming.

"He is going to be seriously disappointed when you don't show up" Sakura said giggling at the thought of how Jiraiya will look when he realized he was swindled.

"But I am going to be there" Tsunade said chuckling as she made her way over to Asuma and Kurenai.

"HUH?" the group muttered as they all looked at Tsunade like she lost her mind. Handing her the scroll she gave to them, she read out loud Naruto's final prank before he went on his honeymoon with Hinata. Everybody gasped as she read the scroll out loud and looked at four people.

"Will you four do it?" she asked Itachi, Sasuke, Ino and her dad who was nodding his head before Tsunade had even finished reading.

"Count me in" Ino said standing and making her way to the door with her father.

"Itachi?"

Everybody was looking at the blank face of the Uchiha who then looked at Sasuke who wore a knowing smirk. Smiling back, he nodded and followed by Sasuke and the rest, made their way over to the Hokage Mansion where Naruto's final surprise for Jiraiya was waiting.

"So, what was that all about with Teuchi-sama and the ring?" Hinata asked as they rode on the back of a six tailed fox (Naruto can summon foxes) and made their way to Suna. Hinata always wanted to travel to distant lands and that's what they were doing on their honeymoon, traveling to a faraway place known for its beaches. Naruto just smiled and said that he would tell her after they make it to Suna while the Kyuubi was laughing and congratulating him on a job well done.

"**That has to be the most elaborate and well-thought out scheme in all the 5 nations. I can't believe you recognized the ring on Teuchi-sama's finger as the ring of maturity and the "brother" to the ring of youth." And then make a deal with him to exchange his ring along with a hefty sum of money, for Jiraiya's ring and the ability to extract revenge for when he was hitting on his daughter. You, Naruto, are truly a master of pranks and getting even."**

'_And that isn't even the best part. The best part is…'_ Naruto finished his conversation with Kyuubi just as they made it to Suna.

"So, were you all able to do it?" Tsunade asked as Ino, her dad, Sasuke and Itachi returned all with smiles on their faces.

"Yep, but you won't believe some of the things we saw" Ino said shuddering at the horrors of a pervert's mind.

"I'm still surprised that he actually tried hitting on Teuchi-san's daughter like that" Ino's dad said as he sat down by his daughter.

"He did what?" Tsunade yelled as everybody turned to look at him when he said that. Nodding, he told them about Jiraiya hitting on Ayame saying things extremely inappropriate while Teuchi-san was right there.

"I'm surprised Teuchi-san isn't looking for revenge after the way Jiraiya done treated his daughter" Ino said looking back at the group as Sasuke, Kakashi, and Itachi went quiet while they thought of something.

"Who said he wasn't?" Sasuke said as the trio finally putting the final pieces of the puzzle together. "I saw Teuchi-san send letters out on messenger birds almost every day and heard him mutter something like _'get all the girls he want'_" Sasuke said finally recognizing the changes in Konoha's streets.

"I bet he set that in motion when he told Jiraiya that he needed to talk to Teuchi" Kakashi said thinking how truly sneaky his former student was. Nodding, Itachi explained how he saw Naruto and Hinata go inside the ramen shop back door and come out with a too happy grin on his face as they left for their honeymoon.

"Sasuke, Kakashi, Itachi, explain to us what Naruto and Teuchi had done to Jiraiya…" Tsunade said a grin forming as they explained how Teuchi was extracting his revenge. In Suna, the Sand siblings, Deidara, and Sasori were laughing as Naruto explained to them Teuchi's form of revenge.

"I can't believe you got Teuchi-sama to secretly take a picture of Jiraiya, place a want ad in all the nearby town's newspapers, and ask for women as old as Chiyo baa-sama from near and far for a 'good time'?" Hinata said looking at her grinning fiancée who was laughing with Kankuro.

"That's not all, it turns out the ring he found was from an underground tomb and is worth millions if returned and Teuchi-sama is good friends with the keeper of the rings who I helped escort back to his village. He said that if he could return the ring of youth, he gets the reward and can keep the ring of maturity in which brings good luck and wealth" Naruto said as he pulled the ring out of his pocket.

"What are you going to use the ring for, un?" Deidara asked looking at the blue stone swirling with colors of yellow and reds.

"First, I'm going to let Hinata wear it so she can hide her age and become my editor and then I'm going to wear it when I start writing my new novel, 'To Be Young Again'. It's what Jiraiya was going to name his new series with the "research" he was collecting but how about I beat him to the punch…since he not going to be waking up any time soon and when he does he will be very busy" Naruto said with an evil grin as Kyuubi laughed at the irony of the word 'busy'.

"What do you mean 'he not going to be waking up any time soon'?" Gaara asked wondering what kind of last minute prank the loud blonde had pulled.

"Well you see…"

The room was in an uproar of laughter as they imagined every old lady lining up at his door.

"That will teach him to mess with every pretty girl that passes by" Shizune said, as she used to see the pervert flirt with any girl that was walking, even her.

"I can't wait till he wakes up and watch the results of Naruto's-"

Just then they heard a yawn coming from the giant screen as the group quickly got into a seat and watch the play unfold. "It seems he changed back to his old self" Sakura muttered as everybody watch as Project Fox Illusion came to an end. They watched as Jiraiya woke up and turned to the person next him in the bed. "Good morning, my love" Jiraiya said pulling back the covers to see…

"Good morning, stranger" Kisame said smiling his shark grin at Jiraiya. The only thing louder than the group laughing at the meeting was Jiraiya's scream in terror at seeing Kisame face.

"How did you convince Kisame to do that?" Sasuke asked his brother between fits of laughter. "I didn't, he left as soon as he heard the plan, saying he wasn't going to do it and that was beyond embarrassing and disturbing. So Tsunade-"

Itachi was cut off by a loud THUD as everybody in the room watched the legendary toad sage, Jiraiya, pass out due to shock. The ANBU, who were delivering a package, heard a loud commotion and ran to the room of the Kage's office to see if there was trouble.

"Kazekage is everything…alright?" they stopped and looked at the group of people laughing and rolling on the floor, holding their sides in fits of laughter. Even Gaara and Sasori were smiling and trying hard not to laugh, while Deidara, Kankuro, and Naruto were laughing so hard, tears were coming out of their eyes.

"Oh man, I going to tease Kisame about that the next time I see him, hn" Deidara said trying to catch his breath.

"Knowing Kisame, he left Konoha right after hearing what he had to do" Sasori stated a catch heard in his voice as he tried hard not to laugh.

"That's why I suggested Tsunade baa-chan use a shadow clone and make it look like Kisame" Naruto said a fox smile showing on his face as he remembered Tsunade's face expression when she read the scroll.

"I wish we stayed in Konoha a little bit longer to see that" Kankuro said finally able to talk again. That's when everybody noticed the ANBU staring at them like they lost their minds. Clearing their throats, everybody looked away, blushing as Gaara answered that nothing was wrong. Still confused, the ANBU handed Naruto a package saying it was from Konoha addressed to him and left wondering what was so funny. Naruto's smile grew as he realized what was in his hand.

"Everybody is about to get their wish" Naruto said as he pulled out a video and a note.

'_Enjoy, because we sure did. Signed, Tsunade'_

It was quiet for a minute until everybody started scrambling out of the office and into another room with a giant screen. Gaara asked his guards to come watch the show as the rest got popcorn, soda, candy, and chips to go with the movie, "_Never Con a Prankster_."

"Hey, Naruto-kun, you never explained what you needed Ino, her dad, Sasuke, and Itachi-san for?" Hinata asked as the movie started.

"You're about to see" is his only response as they watch Jiraiya's rude awakening. After waking up where he passed out, Jiraiya got up to see Tsunade sleeping in the bed. Sighing, believing it to be a horrible nightmare, he woke her up saying he finally got his wish. Smiling, she said she did too and patted her round stomach as Jiraiya's eyes got big and realized she was pregnant.

"NO" Jiraiya screamed as the scene changed before his eyes as three girls, all looking like Tsunade came towards him, calling him daddy and making a fist, glowing with chakra. He shut his eyes, opened them again and everything was back to normal, until he saw Orochimaru in a thong saying it made him feel youthful. Jiraiya's eye twitched and he screamed as he tried to break down the door but couldn't while both groups were too busy enjoying Jiraiya's pain.

"How were they able to record Sasuke's and Itachi's genjutsu inside Jiraiya's mind?" Temari asked shocked at all the things that happened on the screen.

"Ino and her dad went inside his mind and found all his deep dark secrets and fears and told Sasuke and Itachi. Ino's dad then controlled Jiraiya's mind long enough for Itachi to use his sharingan to cast the genjutsu. Sasuke then casted a different genjutsu on the room that created the images as to make it seem like it was real."

"How long is this going to happen?" one of the ANBU asked, eyes glued to the screen.

"Oh, about…72 hours of nonstop torture" Naruto said as Kyuubi said that this prank was dedicated to everybody who had to deal with the pervert. After the first day of torture was over, Naruto and Hinata said their goodbyes to the Sand siblings and Akatsuki partners as they made their way to the Suna opening. Getting back to work, Gaara was in his office with Kankuro while the rest of the group finished watching the torture movie. Going over to his brother, Kankuro noticed that Gaara was filling out a request form that had been approved by the elders and needed his signature.

"Gaara, what is that you're signing?" Kankuro asked as he started reading over his brother's shoulder. Just as Naruto and Hinata had jumped onto the fox Naruto summoned, they heard Kankuro screaming loudly, "YOU'RE OPENING A BROTHEL IN SUNA!" followed by a loud "NARUTO!" just as the newlyweds were halfway gone before the Suna guards could stop them.

"I'll send them a copy of our new book, what do you think Hinata-tenshi?" he asked as she giggled, holding on to his waist as they made several trips along the way to moon country.

*time skip*

"So when are we going back to Konoha?" Uzumaki Hinata asked as she wore her bathing suit, soaking up the rays of the sun on the beach of the moon country.

"In about a month, that should give pervy sage enough time to start his adventure to search the countries looking for us…and this" Naruto said sipping on a drink and holding up a copy of _"To Be Young Again."_

"Do you think anybody will figure out that you wrote that book except for those who already knew?" Hinata asked giving a quick kiss to her husband as she sat in his lap**. **

"**I'm pretty sure word got around as your author's name, '**_**Kit Kyuto**_**'**__**basically gives you away but I'm glad you included me into it. Thanks Naruto"** Kyuubi said from beside him as Naruto learned a jutsu that let him out and enjoy the vacation too.

"Yea, but you know what, it's fun to be an adult too, like when we go back I'm going to officially sign in as Hokage. And my first job is to start rebuilding the Uzumaki clan in the whirlpool country with my new wife-"

Giving Hinata another kiss

"My second-in-command"-

Giving Kyuubi a fist bump

"And all my friends and family in Konoha, thinking about the Konoha 11, sensei's, and Konohamaru Corps."

"Of course, you're going to have to wait on that, for your first task will be pampering me for the next 9 months" Hinata said rubbing her slightly extended belly. Eyes widening, Naruto smiled and said that she always came first and that he will take care of her for the rest of his long life as they sat back and relaxed, enjoying the vacation and thinking about Naruto's and Hinata's next book, "_Dream Come True_".


End file.
